Muerte na Iuvenesco

2009-10-17T20:38:00.003+08:00

i hate the fact that you can't logic away some feelings. or any of them, for that matter.
life would be soooooo much easier.

okay i concede it'll also be a whole lot less fun.
but less painful.
but less fun.
= /
HOW?!
hedonism or plain survival?
*short-lived conflict*
FUN! :D

hahahaha that did not make things easier.
xD

2009-10-16T21:31:00.002+08:00

days like these i know we were made for eternity.

you can listen to the most beautiful, most achingly blissful pieces of music and they're amazing, they're soul-swelling, they make you cry with joy and bittersweetness and they make you feel like the entire human race is just so heartrendingly endearing in their earnestness and their will to live, and yet the most painful part of this is that it inspires the darkest, most terrifying yearning for something more, an unexplainable conviction stirring in the deepest, unspeakable parts of ourselves that there must be an ultimate paradise to be found from all this searching, all this longing and love and life and loss that we can only helplessly express through constant catharsis in art and music and dance and even just striving for our everyday goals and finding contentment in a pure blue sky but down there -

it isn't enough.

and it's because we were made for a higher purpose; we were so fearfully painstakingly joyfully wonderfully brought into this earth and someone, some awesome beautiful one out there, is just waiting for all of us to finally, at long last, realize His love for us and begin preparing for the perfect paradise that will last long long after this earth has faded away and it's but a shadow of a memory. we're lost in this huge world, we're insignificant transient specks who struggle to find meaning and worth in a globe that just wants to move on and on and on and some days we just flop over and our friends seem so far away (when they're probably experiencing the same troubles, but i've realized this isn't something you can ever fully share unless you get in each other's minds) and you're just so tired and there's God, there's Jesus waiting ever so heartachingly patient and He invites us to lose ourselves in His glory and live for Him, and in that we will always always find our true and significant worth because He loves us SO much. (:

and so we will live as expressions of His love, reflections of His glory, eternally joyful in the light of His own enjoyment of His creation. Life won't be easy, but what a comfort that we know He's always holding our hand. :D

and till we see Jesus face to face, we'll trust in Him, and do our best on this earth to reflect more and more of Jesus' own perfect character. (:

so i'll stand
with arms high and heart abandoned
in awe
of the One who gave it all
so i'll stand
my soul LORD to You surrendered
all i am
is Yours

xD

2009-07-04T11:35:00.003+08:00

(you're like the sky. enchanting, everywhere i go, and ever unreachable.)

there's no where else i'd rather be than where i am in life right now. because if i were somewhere else, i wouldn't have had all the experiences i've had, met all the people i've met and been sunk in the depression and risen on the kind of joy that i have. there was real danger of me being in any other class than point seventeen (whom i love) because i was almost going to take B&M and spanish ab and stuff. but no -
and it's
point seventeen
point seventeen
point seventeen
point seventeen
point seventeen
POINT SEVENTEEN FOREVER
especially the ones in art xD
and my brother whom i also love
and the rest of the lot who are such blessed manifestations of 'awesome'.
<3333333333333333333333333333

and. i'll never know what i'm missing out on by coming THIS particular way with THIS particular group of friends in THIS very point in time which is so overwhelmingly insignificant in all the numerous probabilities that could occur in life. in fact nobody knows what they're missing when they're where they are instead of somewhere else. but at least in my case, you know what -

i don't want to be anywhere else, danggit.
<3

2009-05-25T20:26:00.003+08:00

have you ever loved some friends so much you'd cry for their joy or sorrow?
i know i have and heaven knows the number of times i've cried over these people in the past week/month and it's like when they're sad you'd break your body your heart to do anything for them and when they're happy it's as though THE SUN JUST CAME UP ON THE HORIZON. or like being washed in starlight and the aurora borealis and everything is beautiful beautiful beautiful <333 and sometimes when the Lord is kind and you contributed to their YAYNESS in some way you'd be glowing with pure joy for the rest of the week xDDDD

and i'm like the scaredest of pain and things but when i think about these people i can actually convince myself that i'd take a bullet for them and ahhhhhhh hahahahaha i want to give all of them a real big hug right now and tell them how much they mean to me but oh well that can wait and just for now LOVING IS SWEET. ((((((((((:

okay back to owning IB work! ((((((: ALL THE BEST EVERYONE :D:D:D:D:D:D:D I LOVE YOU ALL TOO <3333333>

2009-05-13T22:37:00.002+08:00

every now and then an image of the most breathtaking cityscape fills my mind and i swear it is beautiful; the azure sky and the sprawling clouds and the city, the glorious city of light is below, it is steel and glass and concrete and perfect and concentrated and organized and rich; it is unfathomable despite its coherence to mathematical algorithms and surgical precision, and its people are isolated; they sit in gleaming Fords and Coopers and Lamborghinis and apartments and penthouses and at street corners and they are separated by glass steel concrete and air, air filled with noise that doesn't reach the heart and you zoom in on the whole compact urban utopia, you're closer and closer and you're rushing past the skyscrapers to the level of traffic and you whiz past the cars and traffic lights and one-way signs and you find yourself in an apartment on one of the first few floors; and it's a paradox where you hear the city but not the people and even that is muffled by the hum of the aircon, the oppressive, comforting silence of the isolated apartment, one in a million, the azure sky blazing above. and in the room is a tiny studio, worn out wooden floorboards and mirrors and barres and salmon pink curtains and music, and i'm there and i'm away from home, i'm dystopically lost in the utopia of brilliant cities, but i'm finding home just being engrossed in what i do breathe love: dance.

<3 xD

I WANT A HOLIDAY. for a really extended period of time. (:
one day i'm going hitch-hiking and i probably won't come back.
and i'll flag down a passing starship and get off to see what jon osterman did on mars, then off to the andromedea galaxy where i probably have dopplegangers all ready to have a tea party together.

hahahahha TAKE CARE YOU GUYS (:
with every drop of love,
jaimeeeeeee. xD

2009-05-06T21:08:00.002+08:00

omt haven't been here for the longest time how're you all doing! xD

anyway i haven't had anything specific to talk about for a really, really really really long time simply because LIFE HAS BEEN FREAKING AWESOME AND I HEART HEART HEART MY CLASS and everyone in the school i talk to. (((((((: they are all so easy to love sometimes they really really render the concept of ethical egoism irrelevant, because you genuinely want to see them happy and you'd go altruistic for it. xDDDDDD (not that i'd achieved the nirvana of altruism yet though; working on it ^^)

and i WOULD complain about the knee-which-i-can't-bend, the one that i scraped while trying to save myself from falling after a skid on the pavement on a wet morning and stubbornly refusing to let go of the stuff in both my hands to break my fall and ending up doing this really cool dance-ish one-kneed dash on the floor, 'cept that it was the pavement i was scudding over and my knee was clad in wimpy bare skin which all tore apart and stuff and up to now is still oozing pus, and is being perpetually agitated by extremeeeee cca!dance moves and accidental kneeling-on-the-wrong-knee incidents, and is really one big hilarious farce, but i think i'll save you the pain of reading about such mundane woes of the flesh and move on to PUBLIC TRANSPORT.

i swear public transport is the EPITOME of day-to-day civilian politics. first of all you learn that ultimate punctuality is not determined by the numbers on your watch, but is dictated by the presence of certain particular persons appearing at THIS particular time standing at THAT particular door, and this is where AD POPULUM is law. next, every morning a regular public-transport-commuter will negotiate the complicated and delicate procedures of fitting oneself onto an unevenly crowded train, achieving just the right balance of aggression and courtesy required to find oneself a space in this heatedly competitive and physically constrained community, and hence get on with life or the nine to five or whatever. everyday you will meet with different diplomatic obstacles - chain smokers breathing down your face, well-covered people creating manoeveurability problems... the regular commuter will be forced to use Skills to avoid direct confrontations while maximizing personal comfort; turning the head just so in this casual manner to reach a pocket of nicotine-free oxygen, achieving stability on the perilously rocking train by fitting one's foot into such niches on the floor while holding the upper body still so as not to aggravate the problem of spacial shortage already compounded by the presence of aforementioned well-covered persons and so on. :D this, of course, is all carried out while negotiating the PHYSICAL tricks and sneaky jerks the train loves to make on a regular, predictable basis (to the veterans, that is), compensating by using muscles you never knew you had to attain the most impossible victories against inertia and centrifugal force, but rewarded with the satisfaction of an elegant upright position which defies all laws of Physics.

honestly. life happens on trains. albeit on a miniscule, accelerated scale.

OKAY GOTTA GO SEE YOU GUYS xD
<33333

2009-04-20T22:54:00.001+08:00

and i'm just here again firstly to let ya'll know that i'm not dead, and secondly to declare that I WILL CONQUER WITH THE HELP OF THE FATHER. so there. i'm eating life's lemons and lovin' it.

to the rest of you, HWAITING! (: any awesome stuff to share, just say xD

<3 jaime

2009-03-20T03:57:00.003+08:00

okay before anyone says anything about the legal basis of me being online when i've got 410302938475092 million things to do, well i've got it all under control i will kick huck finn's ass and whack my trench warfare, and throw in one math worksheet. and i'll have my art idea out by monday. and just to prove that i have complete faith about finishing all this stuff, i'm blogging. sothere.

anyway! :D HOW'S EVERYONE DOING!!! xD
hahahaha past two weeks were nuts and stuff; it still feels like the monday of the holidays was yesterday; i don't remember WHAT i did this week besides thrash life out in the OM room for an odyssey of the mind competition which WOOHOO i am not participating in! and this morning was the first time in a long time i been so shagged out - or you can trace it back to the night before, when i'd be typing a sentence on msn and halfway through i'd fall asleep, dream, wake up, finish my sentence and continue the conversation with my bemused cyber correspondent. =_= AND ON TOP OF THAT i smsed all 26 other doodes in my class to wear corporate tee, typing in all twenty six mumbo jumboed handphone numbers while going crossed-eyed at eleven or so, and i don't think i typed a single one wrong >= ) gimme some respect man xD

OH OH AND THE REASON WHY I WAS ACTUALLY BLOGGING IN THE FIRST PLACE WAS TO SAY - I CAN HOLD MY BREATH FOR UP TO TWO MINUTES AND TWENTY SECONDS WOOHOOOO xD

so my classmate and i were using the last fifteen minutes of our chem period generously donated by our chem teacher to our welfare to see who could hold his/her breath longer. and i'm tellin' ya, it's a sleepy day thing. you take a deeeeeeeeeeeeeeep breath, make sure your friend's timing you, and then you fall asleep and forget to breath and wake up to find two minutes are gone. ^^ ownageeee ((((((((((((:

also, my friend and i have decided to resort to quaffing down real sugar to survive the long hours in OM after a suicidal day at school. i won't go into the details in case this is read by minors, or certain way-too-major majors.

xD
HAVE A BRILLIANT WEEKEND EVERYONEEE (:
<3 jaime

2009-03-20T03:57:00.002+08:00

like srsly i just have to say this cuz i can't say anywhere else -
omg TMI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

NOW WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO HUH
bleedin' emo world la, wth. T_T
WHY LIDDAT
SRSLY
SRSLY
SRSLY

okay to everyone else who's feeling down, don't.
i mean.
Jesus is alive.
you're loved more than you can imagine.
aaaaaand
ben&jerry's is still making money despite the recession (though i can't fathom why, but let's give thanks anyway xD).

SO JUST CHEER UP ALREADY
now! at once! sigh i just crumble into oblivion =_=

2009-03-10T18:31:00.003+08:00

okay so i haven't blogged for like the loooooooooooooooooooooooongest time, and i doubt anyone will read this BUT Y'KNOW WHAT i'm just going to tell a small fraction of my life here, the epic emo bit, because that way it sounds cooler to me and i'd know how to handle it better.

well. *clears throat, painfully* SO, i suppose the first big thing that's happened in my life since the beginning of school, i mean the first big bad thing, because that's all we bloggers write about right? - is the event of the sexiest voice i think i've ever had the (mis)fortune to accomodate.

honestly. i hurl @#£$%^&* at those indiscriminate sick people in school, think the whole world around you got *toot* chuck norris-esque immune system is it! i think my throat's got a blueblack fom all the coughing i been doing. aaaaaaaaaaaaand the 39 degree fever wasn't too appreciated, no matter how much i love you guys and how much i love you guys trying to spread some love. BUT LIKE MY MUDDER SAID, some things don't need to share okay. on top of that, my voice is now so screwed up i can verbally floor even the lustiest bassiest guy voice in my school. this creates more than a few problems, one of which being that my lame jokes now sound even lamer because they don't have the saving grace of my naturally endearing DJ-quality dulcet tones to smooth over doh moments. T_T ALSO, i cannot sing along to my big bang songs EXCEPT FOR TOP'S PART, because his voice is like naturally husky and sexily screwed up, right? but top's part is ALWAYS rap and i don't get as much satisfaction from top's rap as GD's rap bit, and i DEFINITELY cannot hit taeyang's note. T_T pissed.

the worst part is, the voice doesn't go with the hair.

for those not in the know, i now plait my hair diagonally across the back of my head and it ends up in the wackiest ponytail at the side of my head. (i have fun changing sides now and then and seeing who notices. ^^) now THIS sort of hair needs, you know, a sort of, like, hyper and fun style to pull it off? kinda hard to be hyper and fun when your voice is trying to be a hitler all by itself, conquering the world with grave and gravelly and completely un-my-hair tones. T_T so you ask, why indulge my hair so much? why configure my entire character according to that lump of black fluff, albeit long fluff, residing on the top of my brains? well i'm telling you now, my hair is directly related to my self-esteem.

(: right so now i've paid my respects to my hair and thorax and all, i can now say extremely loudly and exuberantly - hooray i saw av and sarah and aud and spent a/an *insert expletive* good time with them and eu-sshi on monday! :D:D:D:D:D and, i saw my son shil for like THREE TIMES last week! :D:D:D:D:D and, i just want to say again, I LOVE MY SCHOOL. and my class. to bits and pieces. i just wish i could do more for them. and. i love all my OTHER CRAZILY AWESOME FRIENDS outside my class that make my life so dang worth living. my ex-mg fellows, my coolest OG doodes, random awesome acquaintances in other classes, my art class, and C.O.L.O.U.R.S., the most unlikely gang ever xD and of course, my acapella group. hahahaha a bit <3 to you all. (:

honestly, if my life didn't have all those extra emo stuff, i'd dedicate my blog to talking about how awesome these guys are. okay i suppose the downs make the ups higher. but the good bits by themselves ace life, unsupported.

sooooooooo.

hmm.

i suppose i should just say, since i have resolved not to be a shady annoyingly closed-up character - liana if you read this i think i needa talk to you. honestly if you not happy with anything i did, doing what you're doing now is not going to help anything besides sour up acsi. at the rate you're going now the paint is going to start peeling off the walls, and the IB block is pretty new so we don't really want that. i could do with telling you some stuff i'm not really happy about, and then we can break off as peaceful acquaintances. k?

(:

to everyone out there, HWAITING FOR LIFE. (((((((((((: love you guys long time, and remember GOD LOVES YOU INFINITY TIMES MORE. xD see you around! :D

<3 jaime

2009-02-11T20:18:00.002+08:00

all my posts are going to become epic drabbles. 'cuz by the time school's over i'm no longer mentally equipped to write epics. so anyway.

i love acs indep. apart from the fact that for the first time in my life, i have automatic taps (that actually work!) and iMacs in the ARTROOM (yes, the endpoint of all trash in mg, inclusive of saigang warriors) at my disposal, the staff is freaking talented and I LOVE MY OG and i've gotten waterbombed and hosed down at least twenty times by now, the most curious of which is that the drenching usually comes AFTER the wet games have ended but oh well teenage procrastination, tsk tsk.

secondly, i love my friends, old and new from mg and from ac because they make all the difference between a mugger school and a HARDCORE school. :D and special thanks to grace fong because she's my meal buddy (since all the food portions are all either guy size or guy bite-size, we halve everything) and because she's awesomely loyal like an mg girl ought to be and i love her for that, to aggie and cass because you make my day just by a hug in the corridor and for accompanying through the most ego-beating dance auditions ever, and to ALL the people in my OG, the girls cheryl cheryl nicole poh hui su lyn grace, and especially to the guys james jj monty mukhil ian duc ravin keith ken jesse rheza (i'm sorry if i can't remember all your names but i appreciate you all the same ^^) because i know I'D think it would be damn weird to have guys in my all-girls' school and you've been absolutely awesome (: oh and to the people in grace fong's OG, for being very nice and accomodating to the weird girl with one warped side-plait who can never find her own OG and keeps wandering over to join yours. :D

thirdly, i love my acapella group. i shall take this opportunity to promote mt. carmel youth's VALENTINE'S DAY EVENT, promoting the shining message of platonic love, with good food good company good singing acts (*hint hint*) and great dollops of love to go round. ngee ann poly alumni club, 14th Feb (Sat) from 6.30-10 p.m.; sign up with me and get a ticket for a mere FIVE BUCKS (down from ten). (: COME. then you'll see why i love my acapella buddies. ^^

fourthly, i shall dedicate a small paragraph to say that i love you bat because she made time to meet up with me today even though she's MILES and MILES away at - junior college, and because she always takes all the crap i unload on her. SARANGHAEYO YEONGWEONHI jiayou in your school it'll be fine really! <33

fifthly, everyone else out there who actually reads my blog (and a wee bit smaller portion to those who don't), i love you guys too (: in one way or another you've all made a difference on my life and i appreciate every single bit of encouragement and <3 that came my way. MAY GOD BLESS YOU ALL :D

finally, special thanks to the bubble tea and Yakult institutions for providing daily sustenance to a bemused JC girl who's kind of just sauntering vaguely along with life. if i get 45 points in my IB course, i'll be sure to let you know and we'll own the New Moon adverts.

see you everyone! (:

2009-02-06T20:37:00.002+08:00

the sole purpose of this post is to reassure any remaining faithful readers that i'm still alive. after this i intend to roll into the bath and out of it and past the hair-drying fan into bed in the same motion. no i'm not talking about the cheeseroll, the swissroll, or even the Roll-of-Honour. it's simply known as the "i-spent-about-thirty-hours-of-my-life-listening-to-lectures-in-one-week-with-one-third-of-that-completed-in-one-day-and-if-i-don't-get-my-glutionous-maximuses-in-bed-in-one-hour-i'm-doing-a-Weasley-on-life" roll.

oh, and that i love you guys. ^^ anyway going on a shorttt hiatus until my mind finally registers that i'm actually currently attending school.

<3 xD

2009-02-01T21:29:00.001+08:00

i realize i actually love my parents.
quite a bit.

2009-01-23T10:20:00.002+08:00

day four of my i-love-iljimae-to-bits sojourn:
일지매 영원히! 진짜로 사랑한다~ 제발 행북하세요 ;_;

aiish OH and has anyone watched the king and the clown yet? i say first ah, if anyone dares to even think that lee joon ki is gay, i will stick his/her head up where the sun don't shine because for heaven's sake the poor man got depressed for one whole year because people like them dissed his perfectly straight orientation just based a piece of damn good acting and their own sicko fantasies. = / besides just check him out in iljimae man xD a lean toned figure, a diehard filial mentality, and the sweetest swordplay embedded in a few james-bond-worthy sequences - DOES HE LOOK GAY TO YOU?!?!?! do you need a big hairy philistine to meet your definition of masculinity or what? D:

been meaning to say that for a while now :D lee joon ki 我们永远支持你！

oh and as a sort of reply-commentary to mel's livejournal's latest post which i don't really feel like commenting on but kind of need to/kind of want to, ummmmmmm i'll just say -
bbsk hwaiting!
that'd be big-bang-shin-ki; bigbang-dongbangshinki or dongbang-bigbang whichever diplomatic order you want, i'm fine - but yeah la this whole pit-your-life-and-death-against-the-rival band is sooooo old can D:< hem, hem. xD hahaha omt this is such a dictatorial post, 죄송합니다~

ah and regarding this thing about. you know. going to jcs. and forgetting. and just... becoming indifferent. well. actually. really really really, i don't think it'll happen. at least i'll do my best to not let it happen. okay. 'cuz honestly from experience (and other people's as well), your secondary school friends last the longest. oh and did i mention that MG FRIENDS in particular seem to be made of glue, they can't unstick themselves from each other at all! D:

so anyway what i'm saying is, just go ahead and enjoy jc like you should, make new friends and don't forget the old ones, be happy drink yakult watch iljimae heart lee joon ki do some bbsk-ing today; HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR (i'm going off tomorrow) and i love you guys! xD

2009-01-22T20:46:00.002+08:00

day three of my iljimae orgy:
iz so sad i think i'm going to cry ;_;
who wants to give him a hug now; we'll all go together okay

2009-01-19T21:20:00.003+08:00

disclaimer: i still love big bang

but

lee joon ki will forever be and remain my first love xD

(if anyone needs background knowledge i liked lee joon ki wayyyyy before super junior.)

this.

is.

the most beautiful man in korea.

this is him boiling my heart alive with a frame from

the king and the clown.

(which by the way, if you believe in purely platonic but extremely sweet friendships between people of the same gender, is a really really - no, is THE BEST movie you could watch. if not, just watch it for the historical content. and the epic-ness. and the tragedy. and the love. :D)

and THIS is the reason why i returned to him in the end:

iljimae.

watch it.

it's one of those shows where you actually feel like there's some good in this world, like you've just touched one of those magical verves that runs through every happy or cherished moment in your life, the fabric of which makes up literary classics and a good conversation between good friends and a smile between strangers and stuff like that. it is a masterpiece. and after the cool james-bond-set-in-olden-day-korea bit at the beginning, it plunges into the most heart-rending traumatic childhood tale EVER, and then iljimae grows up and his young adult life is so unfair but his character battles everything with such endearing determination and playfulness you just cry for him ;_;

and to top it off all, the lead is none other than our dearest lee joon ki. (: did i mention his dancing is ABSOLUTION in itself? (i learnt my body wave from him!) it is the physical manifestation of the word "suave". youtube, lee jun ki dance. conoisseurs of all things beautiful, R.I.P. man. ^^

anyway, just as a byside, i resolve to cherish all my friends this year in every way possible. including Jesus (in fact he's the first one on my list). because honestly my life is nothing without them. to everyfriend out there (you know you're a my friend if you consider me one) - SARANGHAE. aishiteru. te amor. I LOVE YOU GUYS!!

:D:D:D

hahahahaha okay have a great year everyone~

2009-01-12T21:26:00.002+08:00

this, my dear friends, is what is known as a

leap of joy.

thank you dear Father.

thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you

i know i totally doubted you at times and i know i still don't understand your ways and stuff and one day i'm going to realize that the path i always wanted and planned to take isn't always the best but for now, THANK YOU for this very unexpected gift.

SO when the seven a1s list was over and done with and there was a little straggly crowd of friends on the stage, i had a sort of strange resigned calm and i started clapping perhaps a little less enthusiastically and i settled back a bit more comfortably and relaxed-ly in my chair. oh background info as to why i'd already deemed it impossible to get more'n seven a1s: fell asleep in physics, screwed up chem prac, wrote a super controversial essay for english (plus screwed up oral) and what was that last one? - oh yeah, none of the questions i spotted for history came out. win right! - so then -

okay, the moment was/is far too epic for me to actually start describing.

8 a1s, what more can i say! :D

2009-01-11T14:06:00.002+08:00

@#£$%^&*

*newsflash*
bringing you updates from the era of the pre-o-level-results-release-date apocalypse; it's twenty-four hours to go and tension mounts all over singapore in agonizing anticipation of the big O bomb! it's panic at the disco - and everywhere else inhabited by at least one trembling o level student, for that matter - and we are seeing strange phenomena occurring all over our tropical island as manifestations of that masochistic dread which precedes every results day like a faithful yearly harbinger of doom and death and destruction; a knowing smile here, a tight-lipped grin there, ominous predictions of lifelong grounding (to non-teen readers, you may compare this suitably to a lifetime chained up in the darkest dungeons of beezelbub, chained to a desk and cleaning up beezelbub's paperwork for all of hell's blazing eternity - and we all know how bad beezelbub's paperwork is; most of hell's fires burn on his paperwork alone if that's any indication), low whispers of wills being penned, parties thrown as if to intensify future pain by experiencing present bliss, hobbies neglected, tasks strewn aside, the noblest of projects in pursuit of ultimate paradise abandoned as hundreds of students from hundreds of schools brought together in the same densely localized chronological boundary wait, with bated breath, for their earthly judgment, watching each excruciating jerk of the second hand, each stroke-inducing circular parade of the minute hand, all contributing towards the speedy sadism of the hour hand which drives relentlessly and inexorably towards the hour in which - in which -

I'M GOING MAD

2009-01-10T17:07:00.002+08:00

if one more person tells me i'll do fine for o levels,
i will kill him. or her. and i don't give a damn about ladies first or anything.

because if i don't do well, your words will be much harder to swallow than the kick i will aim (and execute) at your face or groin, depending on which gender you belong to.
so keep it to yourself. 'cause i don't need false hope.

and to all my dear friends out there who're facing the same fate as mine on this grim monday, i'm not going to tell you to relax or chill or don't worry or anything, not just because i don't want you telling me the same thing, but also 'cause i know exactly how you feel and as far as i'm concerned, pretending everything's normal or that nothing's going to happen isn't going to do much for your pyscological sitch. and your parents might scream and shout and throw things or worse, lock you in a room and give you one of those talks that have you silently screaming and crying for days when you should be used to it by now, but i think this much i can say - that every one of your friends will be there for you because since when were our friendships ever based on grades? so it's not much i can offer, but you have my shoulder to cry on ^^

oh but this is extremely pessimistic of me. of course, excluding murphy's law and every other ineffable rule of the world which states that the unexpected should become the expected simply because it is unexpected, then i expect every one of you, 4T-ians, 4G-ians, after-school crowd and every other random but note-worthy acquaintance of mine to get - maybe not 6 A1s, but enough to enter wherever you're aspiring to. and when that happens you'll owe me a drink. (x

and in the meantime i'll scrutinize the verse which says (vaguely adapted) that our Father won't give us anything we can't handle. and wonder, worst come to worst (in my opinion), what good i can do for this world sweeping roads.

(if you're stuck brooding over the same dark destinies as mine, here's a topic to distract you: what would i do if were working on the same patch of road as the world-renowned road-sweeper jaime liew?
a. throw myself in front of a car in abject defeat
b. do what i can with my lot in life, sweep dilligently and stay out of jaime's way, meanwhile wishing with every scrap of my being that i were more puny and inconspicuous than the aforesaid luminary's one hundred and fifty-eight centimetres
c. get your own rival road-sweeper gang and (futilely) attempt to out-sweep j.l., not knowing that j.l. has already sworn every potential rival into a Supreme Sweeperhood in pursuit of truth, justice and beauty, and also to prevent this sort of half-assed road-sweeping competition
d. join the Supreme Sweeperhood and conquer the world
e. sit by the side of the road and let the idiot sweep the whole road herself, since she thinks she's so damn imba)

anyway, i'm FINALLY learning korean (maybe it's the sort of efficiency and determination that the feeling of the End Being Near gives you, kind of like how your life flashes past you before you end up pushing daisies), aaaand i'm starting on two new artistic projects that hopefully will survive after my imminent passage away (or worse).

oh, and i'm reading lolita. it's sick and perverted and everything the reviews claimed it to be and much more, and any further commentary will render this paragraph R21 and i still don't know how to add the pop-up disclaimer thing or the livejournal one that reminds you "i am 14 and above and mature enough to read this" (like you'd say otherwise if you really wanted to read it but hey at least the website's legal), so i'll just say that it's juicy (feel it bounce around your palate!) and offer to lend it to anyone after i'm done with it, which should be three weeks from now. (:

okay i think your mom's calling you for dinner, you'd better run! ANNYEONG <3 xD
(see you on monday if i will!)

2009-01-03T20:43:00.002+08:00

did i mention to anyone that yours truly now has a bose system sitting happily atop her desk? well in case i forgot, i do. xD
so ends my quest for truth, love, beauty and all the awesomest feel-good things of the world xD haha okay no kidding i still haven't painted my first self-initiated oil painting (the others being forcefully willed upon me by cambridge examiners, torturously administered through the subtle hand of one mr ong ;_;) and neither have i completed my ten-week dance course nor learnt korean or kissed a boy or lifted liana's shirt or any of those things, but dang - having a bose is still as good as having a year long supply of subbed big bang vids, and that my loves is sayin' somethin'. actually no i'd trade ten years of subbed big bang vids for a bose, but let's not say it too loudly or someone might hear shhhh~

if by now anyone hasn't realized what a bose system is, i'll spare you the sardonic comments and what i'd like to think of as my one-in-a-million drop-you-dead you-live-in-a-cave stare and get straight to the point simply because my bose is awesome and i can't wait to wax lyrical about it - it's officially the most awesome heart-bedduming swoon-worthy sound system in the world AND I LOVE IT. :D:D:D

so there's this huuuge denon tuner on top of which is an almost-equally huuuuge amplifier (okay huge for my puny-proportioned table) which takes up a crapload of space on my desk, although i shouldn't even be mentioning that because a bit of space is a SMALL PRICE TO PAY for having this black beauty in your room, and then the quaint bose speakers sit at either end on the top shelf of my table, little angels of sound radiating the most beautiful music to every corner of the room, and then you have the awe-inspiring bose subwoofer patiently positioned beside my desk, emitting the most addictive subsonic bass soundwaves and yes you guessed it that IS absolutely my most favourite part of the whole thing, but i still have heaps of love for the rest of the metal-and-electricity combination. ^^

okay that's the impression you get after actually listening to it (or after dreaming about a bose for nigh on six or so years), because while it looks like so many parts of a black and square genie to me, what i think most people actually see comprises of a messy-ish disjointed five-piece sound set, all dull black and big and geometrically imposing and out-of-place. but hey come on what else could you think after you've heard its thumpin' good beddums? or even more imba, the bose coupled with my zen stone - because i customized my equalizer in my zen to add an extra base boost, plus you turn off the subsonic filter on the bose, and then the bose's own awesomeness adds the last oomph with a beautiful flourish and that, my friends, is as close to heaven-in-your-own-stupid-pink-room as you can get.

so, who's up for a visit! xD

okay my bose is blushing. change topic. right so today i went for my very first outside dance lesson (outside = not in school) with one of my coolest friends and it was hip hop and IT WAS AWESOME xD all the things you always see the professionals doing and dreamt of doing but not daring to try, WE DID 'EM ALL! no kidding definitely not all, but hey it's a start xD hahaha but omt we are so fail okay y'know the workout bit at the beginning of every lesson?

i'll just put a very eloquent three dots right here~

...

and move on to the after-effects. aching? definitely. in pain? absolutely. crumpled out on the floor screaming blue murder? without a doubt. okay minus the screaming bit; we didn't want to attract to much attention BUT I ASSURE YOU we were yelling our lungs out deep in our hearts ;_; and - stumbling out of class gasping for a cold sweet top-up drink? YOU CAN BET ON IT. that is SUCH a smart business okay. a dance studio with accompanying super-ex cafe; now we know how such a small business survived =_=

but it's cool. so i'm not complaining. ^^

right i'm getting back to life and fretting over the O bomb (MY MOM SAYS IT'S EARLY JAN AND MY FRIEND NEAR-CONFIRMS IT'S 12TH JAN, SOS) haengbok hamnida! (((:

oh and -
HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE xD
hwaiting for 2009 always remember that in life there's always something to look forward to~
annyeong! (:

2008-12-30T22:12:00.002+08:00

okay, because it's nighttime and i do have a certain amount of consideration and love for my HDB neighbours, i shall yell it here.
NO I DON'T HAVE effing CABLE!!!!!!!
stop asking! D:

so, mel calls me.
"HEY DO YOU HAVE CABLE?!" (- and i hold the phone a little way from my ear.)
"uh no why?"
"HUH YOU DON'T HAVE CABLE?!?!?!" (i wince a bit but i keep my expression calm so my mom sitting behind me doesn't catch on - just a good habit that prolongs my life a bit here and there)
"no i don't - hello, hello?"
"zzxxxzzzzzkbszzxxBIG BANG IS ON KBS NOW!!" *laughlaugh* "okay nevermind-"
"WHAT THE HELL NO I DON'T HAVE CABLE SO STOP TELLING ME!!!"
"haha okay sorry sorry"
*beep*

grr.

30 seconds later-
"hey shifu big bang is on kbs now! do you have cable?"
i keep my voice and vice down just enough to ask
"... is mel with you?"
"uh no but she just called me (i imagine an "xD" on sann's face now so let's add it in) xD she called you?"
i put on my best "T_T" voice, take a deep breath and go
"YEAH SHE DID and NO I DON'T HAVE CABLE put down the phone now!"

royal T_T

i'm sorry big bang ;_; but i'll catch you on youtube, yaksok isseo~

2008-12-24T09:50:00.026+08:00

japan.

frame with my buddy, in Huis Ten Bosch themepark - a dutch themepark

and over here, a paparazzi shot taken by my dad! o.O

(didn't know he had it in him)

and here -

japan, land of the rising sun.

also a tribute to korea (where my first alleigances lie), the land of the morning calm.

cool right! you can see the camera reflected in the bus window xD

the kiyomizu temple~

and a beautiful day

and this is what you never get in singapore:
and this is the kind of urban cityscape i'm going to lose myself in when i grow up.

mt. fuji, in all her snowcapped shyness

and here, i espied a woodmaiden taking off her coat and doing a few pretty poses xD

and this is me trying to imitate. ^^

(but i think it's not a bad attitude xD)

and this,

is a contented jaime right where she belongs, with blue skies and fair winds and the sun shining on her face.

oh and in case anyone's ever wondered how the sky looks like from a plane -

2008-12-11T20:53:00.002+08:00

i haven't gone to youtube of my own will for like ONE WEEK xDxDxD ('my own will' is added here because i have friends who keep sending me youtube links) IN FACT! i haven't actually SEEN big bang moving for... one week. D: 최송합니다! 종말 보고싶다~

yeahhh~ today i got a korean newspaper xD A REAL KOREAN NEWSPAPER! :D:D:D called hannah press and it's got cool glossy paper and lots of news about singapore and malaysia and indonesia; YES ALL IN MY BELOVED HANGUK xD and i got it for FREE in none other than my own beloved SOL MART IN WEST MALL xD it is my new shrine. (my old one was comics connection) and i brought it home and put it on my bed after reading the first few lines and then when i floomped back into bed for a nap my bed smelt of freshly pressed glossy paper and it was
bliss. (;

aiish but ;_; notwithstanding the smell and everything
i miss my dog
;_;
and i'm doing all these things out of habit, like when i feel something tickling my leg i reach down and grab it and i discover it's just my overly-long hair, or when i go skipping home i smile at everybody in that my-life-is-awesomer-than-yours-so-i'm-just-sharing-0.1%-of-the-joy-by-smiling-at-you way, and then i realize that i can't really do that because i don't have my dog at home anymore and my life is so not awesomer than anybody else's. or like at night i switch off all the lights and i walk across the vast expanse of living room to my room in the dark, and then i look back like i normally do to the kitchen where my dog is caged in (there's a small kitchen gate) for the night and i see the gate open and the kitchen is black black black and there isn't any snout snuffling about the gate or any pitiful whining to be heard. = /

yeesh. so okay i'm a really bad dog owner but hey i still love my dog and I WANT IT BACK HOME. get well soon!

ANYWAY
- oh yeah PEOPLE TELL ME YOUR ADDRESSES if you want a christmas card xD hmm i may not have time to draw a wholeeee lot so i'm praying that not a lot of people see this so that not a lot of people get let down but FIRST 5 PEOPLE TO TELL ME THEIR ADDRESS (through sms, tag - though not encouraged - or email ^^) WILL GET A SPECIAL CUSTOMIZED CHRISTMAS GREETING xD

OH SPEAKING OF CHRISTMAS
come to my church for christmas! 24th december, 7.30p.m. at clementi bible centre, which is our public name displayed outside on the wall but actually we're secretly known as mount carmel bible presbyt-adlfajdazeesh church, and we're having a worship-cum-celebration service on this special christmas eve and the youth will be GREATLY INVOLVED! :D:D including a spot of choreography by yours truly, but i hope that isn't the reason why you'll come. EVERYONE IS INVITED if you've got nothing to do and you intend to spend your christmas eve sitting at home darning socks or watching coffee prince like i told you to do, then go boil your head AND COME TO OUR CHURCH because socks can wait and coffee prince needs to be watched with a clear conscience, which you so totally won't have after i show you my hurt expression that you MISSED OUR CHRISTMAS SERVICE. hahahahaha come yeah! (:

hohum. i'm getting the strangest feeling recently... hmm heck i'll expound on it another time. ANYWAY PEOPLE THIS YEAR really really really really jintcha chongmal zo-ou feels like a special year; the end of Os, the beginning of jc, this and that and everything i'm sure you know your own significant turning points SO I STRONGLY BELIEVE you should really, really really all go and enjoy this holiday xD smile lots, laugh more, don't make your parents angry, love your doggy, listen to music, stare at the sky, moonshine loads, do all the things you always wanted to do breathe deeply and DRINK YOUR YAKULT.

i'm going off to japan in two days' time! EXCITED EXCITED xD if i don't come back in one piece, my comics collection is up for grabs and so are my stuffed toys - but remember this goes to the highest bid! - of love <3 xD and i'm very attached to all my things (part of the reason why my room is so messy) so MANI SARANGHAEJUSEYO; don't anyhow abuse! - if i DO come back in one piece, SEE YOU GUYS and i'll trryyyy to bring back something but that's not a guarantee because right now i'm rock bottom broke. courtesy of my spanking new boots and fluffy watercolours with which imma draw your cards. xD

sooooo
ANNYEONG! (:
<3~

2008-12-09T22:53:00.002+08:00

COFFEE PRINCE IS AMAZINGG xD
jintcha chohayo! yah~

i'm going to pick up my korean again xD

yeahhhh hahahahahaha i feel so absolutely stuffed with sweet stuff right now i'm not even going to start complaining about how my dog became sick and started diarrhoea-ing and vomiting all over the place and how i still, against my better judgement - given that i'd already cleaned up five bloody stinking (i'm not cursing 'right these adjectives are meant to be used here in the very real, literal, olfactorarily-invasive sense) diarrhoea spots plus one vomit patch in the unearthly hours of the morning - had to walk the pitiable ball of fur, and had all my worst fears justified when she squelched out a whole train of brown sticky goo on the pavement; not the pick-up kind but the scrape-off-the-floor-with-the-whole-neighbourhood-of-bukit-batok-watching-and-shaking-their-heads-or-holding-their-noses kind, oh and did i mention how the lift broke down, and how i live on the sixteenth floor, which equated to picking up my poor doggy by her poor stinking matted butt (because no one but i in my family cares to wipe her butt properly after her business and even my concerted efforts have no effect on her monstrously copious fur), and carrying her down sixteen floors and up sixteen floors after that again without breakfast and how i painted the walls of the stairwell rainbow what with my colourful orations up and down, and how my fingers smelt of blood and poo for the whole morning?

yup so you won't hear a word about that, promise. oh in case anyone's interested, skippydoo is now reclining (happier than she would be here i hope) at the vet. whew for a few days PLEASE TO LET HER GET BETTER ahh jintcha shireo skippydoo bogoshipda~

yaa~ i'm going to japan in a few days' time! xD going to start my belated jap education TOMORROW periodperiodperiodperiodperiod hahahahaha aiish life is awesome. ^^

OH EVERYONE - come to my church for christmas! :D 24th december 7.30p.m. at clementi bible centre, secretly known as mount carmel bible presbyta-te-whatever church for worship and celebration :D:D:D:D:D:D

mm cheoneun kaseyo~
<3!

2008-12-03T22:28:00.007+08:00

there's no point in trying to describe my state of mind right now so -

this is how i feel -

yeah totally my way of emo-ing. but it's that kind of mood where all you can do is sit and think and soak yourself in vast imaginary landscapes and drown in trance music and feel noob about life. aiish okay before i risk pouring out my whole sodding life story in a freaking PUBLIC PLACE - which is akin to peeing in a shopping mall - i'm going off right now.

and no big bang can't help me here. although i still love them. i think i always will. (:

2008-11-29T21:03:00.002+08:00

my. table. erupted.
freaking vesuvius evolved in my room and did a couple of stretches and belches AND NOW I CAN'T EVEN BEAR TO LOOK AT MY TABLE IT'S THAT MESSY. if you know me at all it takes a lot. to convince me that something IS messy. i mean i indulge in organized messes. but this - this isn't a mess... it's like. a mass. of stuff.

oh, girl, i cry cry ;_;

aiish and my SOLID FUEL from obs a couple years back?
melted.
oooozed.
f~l~o~w~e~d.
traveled!
went here, went there
LIKE WTH MAN WHAT IS MY TABLE HARBOURING!!!! weapons of self-destruction?!

W
\ /
><
O

and my freaking!throat! I CAN'T BREATHE PROPERLY is that normal? oh well wth wth wth life succckkkssss HAHAHAHA i'm sounding like a dang emo kid man WELL WE ALL HAVE THE RIGHT TO EMO NOW AND THEN.

kk i can feel incoherency creeping over me i'm signing off before i say stuff that i shouldn't, like hmmmm how much yakult i have left in the fridge (cuz, you know, for the really intelligent ones, they could use this to blackmail/threaten me) or stuff like that xD

'night y'all!

2008-11-28T14:01:00.001+08:00

oh, and whoever thinks that water tastes good/ is tasteless is a nerd.

water is the most disgusting substance to drink alone.

2008-11-28T12:36:00.002+08:00

okay so i've got
a cold
a cough
a callousy throat
a custardy nose
= crackpot flu.

T_T

and no, i can't even relish not-going-to-school because i don't have school.
helloooo~
so
whoever knew that sharing a drink could be so lethal man!
especially when the person looks well and good.
can even demo a few porno-esque dance moves T_T

SRSLY

i'm stuck at home PLAYING NEOPETS /banging on the piano /blasting music /smsing my regrets to people whom i'm missing an appointment with /making feeble half-hearted attempts at clearing my table, which obviously isn't going to happen because the added dust and grit flying around is going to turn me into a snot-monster, which isn't a humane condition under any circumstances, including snot-coloured neopets.

so potato. i sincerely sincerely hope you're quite okay now after finishing half of my bandung. choeseonghamnida man ><

yeah i'm totally back to slugging around my house (is this coincidence, or what?) haha speaking of which had a blasted awesome good time at potato's house watched initial D! - i still think edison chen is damned dead hot - laughed at jay chou's wooden acting / banged on the piano - hahahahaha potato actually you quite pro already la i was purposely making it hard for you to learn "so you got it?" "okay already right?" "right back to the chorus" *flumps hands here and there* xD just to see what you'd do AND YOU GOT IT MAN xD *glomp*

oh yuck!- i just cracked my neck and a whole lot of sludge just slipped diagonally back down my throat -

yeah anyway so according to potato T_T i'm going to be studying youtube for the next two months or so like i raped my chem textbook - trying to learn BoA's eat you up dong bang's mirotic and wrong number, bleaching away, and spoofing classical music. during interludes, i will be hard at work painting her canvas wallet, which has yet to appear before my eyes despite all my best mantras and sutras and what-have-you to conjure it. while brushing my teeth, i'm supposed to use the added foam and lubricant to coax beatboxing skills out of my mouth (potato's completely serious about this she'll make me brush my teeth SEVEN TIMES A DAY just to learn it so i can become her piano accompaniment - sp?). oh RIGHT i forgot - i need to play japanese theme songs while i sleep so i can dream up a proper crystalleanes storyboard. if i happen to have a few extra minutes in my daily 24 hours not spent doing all of the above - eg during walking from bathroom to bedroom - i will have a board attached to my left wrist so i can actually draw out what i dream. and did i mention potato also provided me with a time machine so i can have a few extra milliseconds to dream up our potato-slug jacket? - but of course extra time doesn't come for free - i need to give 15 years of my life for every extra second i gain. either that or my fringe. but i ain't giving up my fringe.

seriously potato you can go teach bondage lessons already la.

oh and recently i've been - wait for it - LISTENING TO ENGLISH MUSIC.
like, A LOT. xD
yeah without triggering allergic reactions like having to lick the drainpipe or disgusting stuff like that! (((:
and anyway i have decided -

I LOVE BON JOVI. it's my life my life MY LIFE xDDD okay i know that isn't true but dang i. love. the. song. it can actually make me as high as big bang's shake it can. xD and that, if you know me at all, is the highest compliment i can pay to any thumpin' good beddum.
IWANTTODANCE

2008-11-16T15:44:00.002+08:00

HAHAHAHA this made my day a few days ago:

check out the GDYB action man xD

g-dragon lifting up taeyang's shirt no less ^^

and his six-pack.

I HAVE NOTHING MORE TO SAY xD

and THIS made my whole week - and most likely my whole month:

big bang won male group of the year

and ARTIST OF THE YEAR (daesang).

OMTOMTOMTOMTOMTOMT after a whole month of grumbling about how a particular other group keeps besting our boys...

SERIOUSLY YESSSSSSSSS.

seriously thank you LORD you know how hard i prayed for this man xD

BIG BANG HWAITING!

i love you guys you worked hard you deserve this man.

saranghaeyo!

oh and my dong bang fan-friends, i'm sorry i didn't tell you about the whole voting thing on mnet.com but honestly it looked like dong bang was winning. ^^

WELL ANYWAY~

it's been an eventful week xD

oh and the scholars are off! GOD BLESS YOU GUYS (((: i stood the whole ride on the green line from clementi to changi airport okay. that's how much i love you guys man BETTER FEEL THE LOVE.

<3!

2008-11-14T19:53:00.002+08:00

hahahahahaha!
okay i'm a dweeb. SO WHAT T_T

1) the last person who tagged you is:
POTATO xD

2) your relationship with him/her is:
potato-slug. it's complicated.

3) your impressions on him/her is:
i'd like to say tall, dark and mysterious... but sorry 'tato i can't do it ^^ more like schizo, physically fragile but emotionally hardy, headstrong and damn awesome fun. xD

4) the most memorable thing he/she had done for you:
got herself tangled up in the k-web. xD okay maybe that wasn't for me BUT I FLATTER MYSELF THAT IT WAS xD

5) the most memorable thing he/she said to you:
"your dancing is awesome!" why thank you xD or like "HAHA you SLUG" when i was chugging up the stairs

6) if he/she becomes your lover you will:
be sick in the bathroom

7) if he/she becomes your lover, thing he/she has to improve on will be:
her gender

8) if he/she becomes your enemy , the reason will be:
won't happen

9) the most desired thing you wanna do for him/her now is:
make her laugh (too! xD) because when she starts i start annen i start improving my stomach abs.

10) your overall impression on him/her is:
potato. come on la it would take AGESS to characterize ANYBODY let alone this underground stem. ^^

xD okay happy now gayle!
srslyyyy~

2008-11-14T11:22:00.002+08:00

HELLO I'M BACK xD
from two days of hardcore walking. and standing. because no one gives up a seat on the mrt to a heavily-burdened but coolly-dressed hooligan. T_T

well before i trundle off to slurp my terribly unhealthy instant noodles, my dear potato (a.k.a our dear gayle, for those who know her) just did this thing on her blog so now i gotta do it =_= ah well i guess i got some time xD

1) the last person who tagged you is:
... me? = / no tha'll be shil xD

2) your relationship with him/her is:
mother-son. (: <

3) your impressions on him/her is:
tall, dark and mysterious

4) the most memorable thing he/she had done for you:
came for my birthday xD

5) the most memorable thing he/she said to you:
can't remember the exact quote, but it's either something to do with happy birthday, polar bears or ahhhh my email can't work!

6) if he/she becomes your lover you will:
mmmphincestcough

7) if he/she becomes your lover, thing he/she has to improve on will be:
learn to relax more. but still
mmmphincestcough

8) if he/she becomes your enemy , the reason will be:
he's absolutely realistic and i'm completely idealistic

9) the most desired thing you wanna do for him/her now is:
make him laugh. cuz he doesn't. ):

10) your overall impression on him/her is:
tall, dark and mysterious xD

11) how you think people around you feel about you:
that i'm very weird ;_;

12) the character you love about yourself is:
that i'm very weird? (:

13) on the contrary, the character you hate about yourself is:
i can't fathom un-weird people so i don't know how to treat them properly ;_;

14) the most ideal person you wanna be is:
cut and paste the MGS motto. i can't say it now it hurts too much that i'm not in that school anymore ;_;

15) pass this quiz to 10 people that you wish to know how they feel about you:
1) bat
2) lyddie a.k.a aggie xD - but it won't happen cuz she don't read blogs
3) ahma (but i can't imagine her doing quizzes ^^)
4) hyung
5) liana (doesn't read blogs)
6) mel (ditto)
7) sann (ditto)
8) shil
9) miss tan
10) my dog

16) who is no. 6 having a relationship with?
jaejoong and the rest of dong bang

17) is no. 9 a male or a female?
FEMALE

18) if no. 7 and no. 10 are together , will it be a good thing?
eew!

19) how about no. 8 and 5 ?
no not really different religions = /

20) what is no. 2 studying about?
... just ended Os! NO MORE STUDYING xD

21) when was the last time you had a chat with no. 3 ?
yesterday!

22) what music band does no. 8 like?
O_o no band? like... western classical ._.

23) does no. 1 have any siblings?
*cough*idunno*cough* i think um one brother ._. or did i just imagine that SORRY BAT ;_;

24) will you woo no. 3 ?
O_O ahma cover your eyes

25) how bout no. 7?
O_O i might xD

26) Is no. 10 single?
yeah she's castrated... i mean sterilised.

27) whats the surname of no. 5?
chek!

28) whats the hobby of no. 4?
hmmmmmmm dbsk-ing, baking, doing art that she actually enjoys? chilling out, basically - cuz she's hyung xD

29) do no. 5 and 9 get along?
yeah pretty well i should say

30) where is no. 2 studying at?
we're not in a school anymore ;_; but the last i checked it was MGS

31) talk something casually about no.1?
BAT ARE YOU STILL reading fanfic? anyway YAY Os ARE OVER LIFE IS WAITING FOR YOU TALK TO HIM xD

32) have you tried to develop feelings for no.8?
no!

33) where does no. 9 live at?
brsshh i dunno some seriously far place like uh kranji-ish? = /

34) what colour does no. 4 like?
O_O does an art girl have a favourite colour we hate them all! they misbehave so badly grr hmm black = /

35) are no. 1 and 5 best friends?
nehhh they're both scared of each other xD

36) does no. 7 like no. 2?
like as in? LURRVEEE? actually i think so. ^^

37) how do you get to know no. 2?
my awesome awesome awesome awesome awesome awesome counterpart in p5, AGGIEEE xD

38) does no. 1 have any pets?
um no against religion...?

39) is no. 7 the sexiest person in the world?
i'd say yes but then i remember taeyang xD okay yeah the sexiest in class. when she plays netball. (:

OKAY MY NOODLES ARE TOTALLY EXPANDING. bye 'yall xD

2008-11-11T10:20:00.002+08:00

GONG LI IS NOW A SINGAPOREAN! :D
we have a celeb in this sunny island! xD

well anyway i was just asking my mom, what do you need to become a singapore citizen? and she told me, something along the lines of needing a professional job, a certain income level etc etc. annen i thought about it for a while, cuz if you need a prof. job then foreign li'l kids can't become singapore citizens right? so i asked her,

"what about kiddos?"

and she said "kiddos don't become singapore citizens." and only those born in singapore are. and in fact the govt takes great pains to ensure that children of non-singapore citizens are not born here - which is why if a foreign worker gets pregnant she's deported immediately.

well HOW'S THAT FOLKS! :D

I AM A SINGAPORE KIDDO. like, HOW MANY OF THESE ARE THERE IN THE WORLD?!

so be proud of it man! :D

2008-11-10T17:51:00.002+08:00

maisie's birthday is tomorrow, so

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MAISIE xD

TABI says "saengil chukha hamnida!" ^^

anyway i managed to do up my new blogskin in under two hours! RECORD. (: with my mom in the house! plus sourcing, reformatting, troubleshooting etc etc etc had a few hiccups with the cbox, you can see i've got a new one. colour's different anyway~

ZOMG ONE MORE PAPER TO GO xD

2008-11-04T21:32:00.004+08:00

for anyone who needs a bit of prettiness to look at:

my dog.

meet skippy! isn't she the most beautiful thing? ^^

big bang is back.

most definitely, incredible

BUY THEIR ALBUM!

then big bang doesn't have to work 'till they get less sleep than art girls.

yes, much less sleep than art girls.

didn't know that was possible? ^^

well that's BIG BANG for you; they work for their fans! :D

but their fans want them to take good care of themselves

SO BUY THEIR ALBUM NOW! :D

you know you want to~

oh yes, and that's taeyang blowing bubble gum up there. xD (hoo boy he's talented man. dancing, singing, standing-around-looking-cool, playing the piano, and now blowing gum! okay admittedly it could be a bigger bubble but yours truly can't even bother to chew the taste out of the gum, much less exert the tongue and jaw to produce a popper. indeed, bubblegumblowers have admirable perseverance, philosophy, and professionality. my highest respect goes out to those who blow gum. AND NOW I FIND OUT TAEYANG CAN DO IT xD *runs around the room screaming*)

while we're on the subject, allow me to compliment big bang on their AESTHETICALLY WIN!newconcept for their album xD finally, a group breaking away from the convention of dark palettes, from-under-the-eyelids-melt-your-heart looks... and it's none other than BIG BANG! :D as always with taeyang in the centre - i think it may have to do with concealing his true lack of real manly height - and the whole thing looking absolutely refreshing and overflowing with charisma xD

hahaha anyway back to the more pressing issue at hand (other than raising funds to get big bang's new album xD) - O LEVELSZZXX D: i'm scared stiff for lit >

on a happier note, O LEVELS IS ALMOST OVER SO TAKE HEART ALL YE SUFFERING SINGAPOREAN SCHOOL STUDENTS! haha seriously i just found out recently exactly how much my friends are looking forward to the end of Os... dropped my usual email correspondents (from my class) a postscript - "oh yeah so what're we going to do afte Os?" - and four hours later, i arrived back at the com to discover a whopping thirty-two emails waiting in my bloated inbox. srsly guys check the enthusiasm a little; it's overflowing into the house and my parents are getting suspicious ._. xD

well that said and done, i really need to get back to immersing myself in the finer intricacies of my beloved mother tongue, especially since i lost my dicky (my dictionary; whatever were you thinking! i'm shocked. shocked!) and won't be able to enlist its help tomorrow ^^

annyeonghigyeseyo! (or annyeonghikaseyo, i can't remember how to differentiate them anymore) HWAITING and work hard like big bang!

and may the blessings of our dear heavenly Father follow you always (:

goodnight and goodbye and keep well!

<3 the Darkening Dawn

2008-11-02T23:46:00.004+08:00

help my nose is bleeding real bad

look there's our boy looking as fine as he ever did xD

did YOU ever see winter clothing look so hot?

'cause i sure haven't.

taeyang makes winter look positively warm.

and everytime i see THIS one i stop breathing for about ten seconds.

ne and thus concludes this fine night's session on the ZOMGLOOKATTAEYANG series! :D i hope you enjoyed yourself; it's JAIME LIEW always with you, good luck and God bless!

<3>

2008-10-30T17:06:00.003+08:00

holy. freaking. poo.

look at that.

so what if he's vertically challenged man.

you wanna challenge those abs?

those GUNS?!

(with a cool mohikan hairstyle to top off the whole delectable scene?)

and here, taeyang giving all of us a charismatic drop-you-dead stare

and another one with him at peace in the korean music industry. (:

and this is how well our beloved YANG CEO (head of YG entertainment company - the company that owns big bang and hence the company we are forever indebted to) treats his employees! comissioning these cute cariacatures (sp?) of them xD

meet mr. bebe, a.k.a the adorable cartoon miniataure of taeyang.

oh boy, i cry cry
xD

anyway shil, i still think 41 points is a mighty job done so i'll give no comment on the potential extra four points ^^

and mr ong i hope you're better and your nose isn't so red anymore or rudolf will have to pay you an obligatory get-well visit, just between relatives, you understand. (:

and abby i KNOW you'll survive this week - to everyone else, check out what a heroine abby is. tuesday - half history. wednesday - ART and physics (to everyone who doesn't know the amount of blood and vomit we pour into the subject of art, just know that it's absolutely no joke). oh, did i mention physics was a crap ass paper? "an X-ray has a wavelength of... blahblah... about the size of an atom. what is the wavelength of an X-ray?" yeah hello? are we sitting for the correct syllabus here? or the correct subject, while we're at it? - anyway, THURSDAY - e math, which was as fashionably undoable as e math ever was, and FRIDAY - get this - BIO. most people have either half history or bio. but I KNOW YOU CAN DO IT ABBY we're all rooting for you! :D:D

art is over. like really sincerely from the bottom of my heart OVER what are we going to do with our lives now? or use for an excuse for not doing homework? huh? - okay on a more serious note, this is the FIRST TIME in TWO YEARS that our lives are FREE from art.
feels... weird.
= /

and to everyone still taking O levels:
HWAITING! i love you all even if i don't look it sometimes and remember that our dear LORD has plans to prosper us and not to harm us so just do your best and even if He sends you to a tertiary institution not of your choice it's for a reason. mm so have faith (:

<3 JAEMI (:

2008-10-25T17:32:00.003+08:00

how can we not love taeyang!

okay after Os i'll properly introduce my new love (actually not very new already but oh well xD) but right now all you need to know is that TAEYANG is mr nice guy from BIG BANG (whom i love more than taeyang xD), his name means "SUN" and his real name is DONG YEONG BAE and he is without a doubt the best R&B dancer in korea. and he has the nicest smile in the whole world (although i treasure my friends' smiles more). and the most mesmerizing eyes. and i really, really, really really really like him. ^^

RIGHT THEN that aside, EVERYBODY

JIAYOU FOR O LEVELS!

if not, then jiayou for enjoying life with a clear conscience while the rest of your friends add oil for o levels. *smirk*

kidding.

saranghae! (:

<3>

2008-10-01T00:02:00.003+08:00

i suppose, given my not-very-unknown derision of children (just the little human ones; i've nothing against animal kittens), that it would be moderately surprising to some that i really DIDN'T want to grow up when i was a kid. cuz i was a cute kid. no i'm kidding xD mostly it was just because i couldn't imagine myself having such vivid fantasies in the world of LOTR and stuff like that (don't snicker i still love lotr okayy) when i was... biologically altered. = / (just for the record, i think i have MORE fantastical dreams now than i ever did when i was a kid.)

but i love being older because although you feel a whole lot more pain (more than you ever thought you could endure) everything is so much sweeter. mutual dependence? probably.

the midgets in my school block have a lot to learn. >= ) good luck to them.

/

and silence
is in the quivering tear about to fall
from eyelashes
in which is reflected
the silence
ringing in the people's heads as
the son is laid to eternal
quiet; silence
seeping from a bloodied battlefield
conceived in the throes of
silence
and mutual misunderstandings
manifested in the golden halos of
silence surrounding
each lonely angel of
the urban utopia
folded up in white downy wings
in the cold silence
of the hum of the aircon
even as the
silence of darkness and the
silence of solitary street lights
blankets the
aggressive silence of a fitful city in
peace
and quiet
where the cherubims and seraphims
silently long
for home
the silence of security
the security of constant sound
the sound of contentment
and the peaceful blinking of the eye
even as the crystal teardrop
falls to
rest
in silence.
and stealthily, the aurora borealis
dawns gently, tenderly
upon the weary beloved of the world
and silence is complete
the golden is all-encompassing.
silence, beloved.

2008-09-01T20:54:00.002+08:00

to my son shil:
because it's BELATED so you get a whole post on it-

HAPPY belated BIRTHDAY!

<3
mommy.

2008-08-18T01:56:00.001+08:00

fengtianwei<3.

2008-08-12T01:13:00.003+08:00

'cause it's a bittersweet symphony, this life

wake up in bed crying from tears of joy

heck founder's day pictures for now (GO FACEBOOK; there's a reason why i spent a whole sunday afternoon creating it! D:);

to all those drowning out there:

drowning in exams, in cliched but very, very real emotional problems, drowning even though you don't know why and just dying in this whole faked-up urban utopia that the human race's made such a mess of:

there's hope in life.

/the Darkening Dawn

2008-07-29T23:30:00.002+08:00

when your pile of homework isn't getting any less no matter how hard you slog away at it with one malfunctioning eye,
you know it's time to get philosophical
on your blog.

so.
my inefficient brain just went on a hiatus to bali or japan or some obscure made-up fantasy land conceived in my short and sad past. in its travels, it sent back non sequitur tidbits of information on Life and how to cheat in it (or so it thinks).

stuff like.

1. look towards the 13th of November and not the 20th of October.
after all, the whole point of the 20th of October IS to lead up to the 13th of November, in't it?

2. study smart. you win not by doing more of the same thing than other people, but by doing something different from other people.
so don't be an idiot and do your TYS three times, like some people swear by. time is money and money is time and TYS sure ain't worth your time or money. move on already! if you'd just look around, Popular is guidebooks and assessment books galore xD

3. on humanity: have you a glass heart or a jelly heart?
this came out of reading and doing too many of those chinese comprehensions which specialize specially in lengthy commentaries on moral values and being a human and suchlike. i can just imagine myself composing an entire examination piece on this topic, scribbling in messy-neat chinese calligraphy ni yong you de shi yi ge bo li xin huo shi yi ge zhe-ye-li xin? glass hearts are often used to describe the pure and transparent character of the hearts of little kids (a STEREOTYPICAL view, of course; the little kids in OUR school block have hearts like that in Davy Jones' locker T_T). BUT I SAY JELLY HEARTS ARE ALWAYS BETTER and the reason why jelly hearts aren't immortalized as a noble metaphor for good moral character is because chinese doesn't have a nice name for it. WHY JELLY HEARTS? cuz not only are they transparent (you neh know, the refractive index of jelly may even be LESS than that of glass! :D), they're nice and malleable - YET NEVER CONFORMING - and best of all, they're sweet and hence they make people happy. and what do glass hearts do? sit and stone. very good, glass-hearted.
- but of course all this is subjective. i mean MY heart is obviously made of BLACK glass, but it goes all jellified and blushes transparent at the thought of O levels. so. = /

my brain is retarded la.
ANYWAY-

xD FOUNDER'S DAY DINNER :D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D
i swear i'll post the pictures as soon as the lump of my left eye heals and i can finally distinguish between good pics and pics of a pontianak.
but you know, you COULD always make good use of my spanking new facebook account to look at random tagged pics AND OF COURSE, ALL MY PRETTY PRETTY PRETTY gorgeous friends in MG. tell me MGS girls are the fairest of them all. xD liana was completely fever, jong was absolutely beautiful if i may say so xD, grace fong was cinderella, ahma was O_O :D:D well DONE ahma xD, THIAM aiish thiam what on earth - take off braces grow long hair buy korean dress thiam ah thiam ^^ topped off with an awesome awsome camera (:, HYUNG sexxyyy xD, melin <3, claire chong sze nat wong audrey tan char la YOU GUYS CAN GO BE MODELS ALREADY LA wth T_T, AV HONEYY completely turned me ON ^^, the dance girls were simply to die for and WHEEEEE MY EYES MY EYES happiness. (mebbe that's why my eye is completely collapsed now xD) aiya BAT WHY YOU NEH COME D:

oh yes and THE NEW DANCE COMM. well i know you guys don't exactly read this but oh well the world deserves to know. laura janice audrey jiahui charlotte. and glenda and celeste. okay imma be frank and right out that this wasn't the comm i expected, but HEY that doesn't mean it's not an ideal comm! OUR comm was hardly the predicted outcome but come on man. what comm rocks more than ours xD AND YOU GUYS CAN BE EVEN BETTER. i have faith in all of you - i've watched you grow, watched you dance, watched you cry, watched you bleed - and just give your best for the best cca ever. promise! and i'll come back often and bug you guys because i love you all so much xD GO FORTH AND CONQUER MAN.

okay back to my books now if by the time i get off the com my left of the side of the face has stopped throbbing. aiish. ah well at least it happened after founder's. but then again, it was most probably caused by founder's T_T all the stuff that went on my face! D:

AND ONE MORE THING TO EVERYBODY
stop asking me about art. i have a plan. and whether or not i manage to execute that plan depends on circumstances (unwelcome extra assignments, physical and mental wellbeing). but you guys telling me that i'm suicidal not doing my art now is not going to help SO I APPRECIATE IT VERY MUCH THAT Y'ALL MISS ME SO MUCH xD but please. no more no more ^^ hmm mr ong, if you're reading this do you happen to have any ideas for an installation? i kinda like the idea of chains all over the place but i needa justify it. = /
oh yeah and if anyone's interested to know where i actually spend my afternoons, it's at HOME burying my face and hair and everything in my guidebooks. because you know what, i love art but it's only ONE a1. (although i wish it wasn't so.)
OKAY ENOUGH EMOING

saranghaeyo! (:

the DARKENING DAWN,
in furious pursuit of antiknowledge

2008-07-16T21:34:00.003+08:00

i've been in a mugger slump lately. that is to say I JUST DON'T FEEL STRESSED ANYMORE and that's really really scary it's like i'm numb and with completely no motivation for ANYTHING; art, physics, chem, amath, everythinggg

but hey i think our dear Lord really has everything in his hands man. if i were as stressed as last week i wouldn't be able to enjoy anything in this week. and BOY has there been a lot to savour in the past three days! ((((((((((:

monday - off on another PSB date! :D:D thank you boss (: AIYA BAT WHY YOU NEH COME ;_;

tuesday - HAPPY BIRTHDAY JONG. i'll never know another piggie as awesome as you! :D:D haha so yes my afternoon spent EATING LUNCH (zomg i sinnneeddd) with you and shuyi and liana was completely not wasted. and seriously thank God i wasn't so bothered about my art as to be very bad company. loveeee! (:

wednesday -
TODAY.
sec 4 farewell.
...
okay i knew i was going to cry but - D: it was like something BROKE inside me or something ;_; s'gotta be the most choked-on speech i've ever made >_< look at how far we've come. i've never loved my juniors this much before. we're REALLY, truly a family now.

KEEP THE SPIRIT AFLAME in the light of dance.

mg dance i love you forever and ever amen.

thank you so much for everything you've given me.

SEC 4s! :D

we'll come back so often you'll get sick of us >= )

jiayou for everything in life!

saranghamnida (((((((:

/on a heavier note, I'M GOING TO DIE EARLIER THAN I THOUGHT (and my estimate was 20 ;_;) argh seven of the colours i use in oil paints are TOXIC wth! D: (and my uniform is... smothered in it OHNO I JUST REALIZED) add to that the turpentine fumes wafting all around the room from people eagerly transforming thick oil paint into watercolour washes ;_; AND YOU GET AN ARTROOM FULL OF DRUGGED, DRUNK AND STUPID MG GIRLS

SOS

;_;

hahahaha whatever la. art is my life and it will take my life. ;_;

goodnight everyone! (: haengbok hamnida! :D

<3>

2008-07-11T23:17:00.002+08:00

argh these are the times when i really REALLY wish i still had dance to burn the lipids D:

if i can't stop eating (and i can't),

imma go running everyday. >= /

i shall go running before art. 'nen with adrenalin pumping through my system, i will climb up six flights of stairs to my personal paradoxical hell 'nnen I WILL PAINT UNTIL THE COWS COME HOME (or super junior comes to singapore T_T).

= / don't ask me what i'm going to do about chem and physics. i'm working on that.

jiayou art girls!!!!!!!!! (((((((((:
WE WILL SURVIVE
mr ong you'll see! T_T

ARGH KILL ME NOW

dreaming of hara-kiri
the Darkening Dawn.

2008-07-06T21:47:00.011+08:00

mg dance night '08
and the butterfly breaks free of the cocoon (:

i think i hadn't performed in front of a real audience (and not a panel of stone-faced SYF judges) for so long i was getting withdrawal symptoms D:

like, random camwhoring urges ^^ (ripped off yiling's blog xD):

AND FINALLY THE REAL THING

above: my beautiful dance comm. (:

and below: the wonderful people who came to support <3

THANK YOU EVERYONE.

thanks to the teachers-in-charge, mrs joyce ang, mrs grace poh, mrs nicole phua, mrs seetoh xD awesome awesome people who constantly encouraged us and probably worked harder than anyone else (:

to my friends and family, random sms people boss&bat xD, rmun doodes pek zk ziyad ros ros' cousin (and jerrell though you weren't there ;_;), sann liana jong sarah nicole eunice nat wong audrey melin and gang (i'm sorry if i don't remember D: but i APPREICIATE IT ALL THE SAME), gayleee xD, marcus, BUDDEEEEEE mommy daddy! (: hahahaha you guys made all the difference between an extraordinary and a perfect night xD

to stong for pictures (i'm thanking you in advance so pressure pressure >=D) and for being the awesomest most SADISTIC art teacher ever;

to the prettiest bunch of girls i'll ever know - mg dance comm '08! zomg i can't say this enough - i love you guys so MUCH i could cry D: i couldn't be prouder of sharing the stage with people like all of you - janice laura sheryl grace yiling sharon; just THANK YOU for making my last year in mg dance club one of the happiest of my life. (: <3love>

AND THANK YOU LORD JUST BECAUSE. (:

high tea tmr xD

goodnight everybody (: all the best in your future dance of life!

<3,>

2008-07-01T23:13:00.001+08:00

heeeelppp D:

i need to stop eating.

;_;
why does food have to taste SO GOOD?!

wallowing in the flabs,
the Darkening Dawn

2008-06-28T22:17:00.003+08:00

HAHAHAHA lurking around cyberspace searching for things for our @#£$%^&* NDP Lit assignment, I ended up on none other than MRBROWN'S BLOG and this is what I decided to rip off it:

You know you're living in 2008 (okay so this post was in 2003, but really we haven't changed that much in five years - just exaggerate everything here by 10 and you'll get reality) when...

1. Your reason for not staying in touch with family is because they do not have e-mail.
2. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of three.
3. Your grandmother asks you to send her a JPEG file of your newborn so she can create a screen saver.
4. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home.
5. Every commercial on television has a web site address at the bottom of the screen.
6. You buy a computer and 3 months later it's out of date and sells for half the price you paid.
7. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go get it.
8. Using real money, instead of credit or debit, to make a purchase would be a hassle and take planning.
9. You just tried to enter your password on the microwave.
10. You consider second-day air delivery painfully slow.
11. Your dining room table is now your flat filing cabinet.
12. Your idea of being organized is multiple-colored Post-it notes.
13. You hear most of your jokes via e-mail instead of in person.
14. You get an extra phone line so you can get phone calls.
15. You disconnect from the Internet and get this awful feeling, as if you just pulled the plug on a loved one.
16. You get up in the morning and go online before getting your coffee.
17. You wake up at 2 AM to go to the bathroom and check your E-mail on your way back to bed.
18. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. :)
19. You're reading this and nodding and laughing.
20. Even worse; you know exactly who you are going to forward this to!!
21. Worst of all, you've got a weblog to post it on!!!!

epicLOL! number eighteen cracked me up. you get this non sequitur smiley staring back at you and ZOMG IT LOOKS SO INNOCENT but D: xD
hahaha and fyi, i don't do no.18 (ironically, my reigster number in school is no.18 T_T) because i can't. recently i cracked my neck so much my left side of the neck hurts like... *tries tilting head to the left several times to see how it feels like* OW! okay that was just = / it hurt like tomatoes. like having the fridge devoid of yakult D: haha so :) is a big no-no in real life ^^

:D I WENT TO ART FRIENDS AGAIN TODAY
put me there any longer and my residual hongbao money will be gone in a flash. next thing you know i'll be breaking into houses at night to finance my art friends exploits. give or take a few months i'll be spending my physics and chem periods planning grand bank robberies. xD

BUT I STILL COULDN'T GET MY LIT BOOK
;_;
i couldn't find it ANYWHERE in kino! SOMEBODY HEEELLPPPPP
whose life is it anyway/brian clark

okay back to my national day theme song assignment and feeling all gooey patriotic about every single cheesy song our beloved nation ever squeezed out of its poor songwriters.

JOIE DE VIVRE
the Darkening Dawn.

2008-06-27T21:27:00.003+08:00

today mr yeo said-
"nah i don't support any team. just enjoy good football." *push up specs*
xD

come for dance night

and today was retarded.
ended dance and everything pack bag etc etc at a whopping SEVEN o.O
walked out of school past the whole CROWD of people going for loveMG T_T
crossed the traffic light; avril's "epic meeting" with me going one direction and av+sann&co going the other D:
;_;

come for dance night MGS ME LAU HALL

and our new seating arrangement is equally retarded.
hooray for free seating xD
three rows, 8 10 10 (: it's like some freaking communist cohesiveness man xD i love it. of course there's the small small problem of me being right in the middle of the row of eight (okay i know i asked for it T_T because my table is so effing loaded and heavy and ben zhong it just refuses to budge when i try to move it, so people gotta move around me ^^), i have to resort to extreme gymnastics to get out of my seat D:
:D
poor mr liu and mr yeo ^^

come for dance night MGS ME LAU HALL 7.30 p.m.

boss is even more retarded.
wth 100 squares and a hello kitty chop?!
D:
but the 100 dates thing is <3 xD 99 more to go xD
then it'll be MY bubble tea stint AND you'll owe me many many more! >= )
peanut sesame ball pact.

come for dance night MGS ME LAU HALL 7.30 p.m. $15

bat! xD i have something completely retarded to tell you ^^
and thanks for going home with me the other day OH MAN I HAVEN'T TALKED TO YOU FOR SO LONG and D: xD soso are you coming for dance night? xD and ;_; andand um i may not be able to find you after school cuz of dance >_<

come for dance night MGS ME LAU HALL 7.30 p.m. $15 ON THE 5TH OF JULY

OH AND COLDPLAY IS AWESOME.
I used to rule the world
Seas would rise when
I gave the word
Now in the morning
I sweep alone
Sweep the streets
I used to own

I used to roll the dice
Feel the fear in my enemy's eyes
Listen as the crowd would sing:
"Now the old king is dead! Long live the king!"
One minute I held the key
Next the walls were closed on me
And I discovered that my castles stand
Upon pillars of salt and pillars of sand

I hear Jerusalem bells a ringing
Roman Cavalry choirs are
my mirror my sword and shield
My missionaries in a foreign
For some reason I can't explain
Once you go there was never, never an honest word
That was when I ruled the world

It was the wicked and wild
Blew down the doors to let me in.
Shattered windows and the sound of drums
People couldn't believe what I'd become

Revolutionaries wait
For my head on a silver plate
Just a puppet on a lonely string
Oh who would ever want to be king?
I hear Jerusalem bells a ringing
Roman Cavalry choirs are singing
Be my mirror my sword and shield
My missionaries in a foreign field
For some reason I can't explain
I know Saint Peter won't call my
Never an honest word
But that was when I ruled the world

I hear Jerusalem bells a ringing
Roman Cavalry choirs are singing
Be my mirror my sword and shield
My missionaries in a foreign field
For some reason I can't explain
I know Saint Peter won't call my name
Never an honest word
But that was when I ruled the world.

JUST GET THE ALBUM ALREADY

come for dance night MGS ME LAU HALL 7.30 p.m. $15 ON THE OF JULY

today... i understood chem for the first time in a long time xD
okay so organic chem pwns.
^^

everybody come for dance night MGS ME LAU HALL 7.30 p.m. $15 ON THE 5TH OF JULY. aiiight? xD

hooz~
immacrashman.

<3!
the Darkening Dawn

2008-06-20T12:16:00.006+08:00

dance.

so all you see is-

grace. power. beauty.

and of course everyone forgets the

blood. sweat. fatalities...

nah just kidding. ^^ but the blood is real and so is the perspiration.

9a.m-7p.m. 7.30a.m.-5.30p.m. 8a.m.-5.30p.m.

i think i died more than once

three straight days of hardcore dancing-

is no joke.

half the time everyone ends up nothing but a trembling puddle of sweat on the floor

BUT - because i heart dance and because i swear by sadomasochism-

i have only one thing to say:

Oooooohhh YEEEAAAHHHHH. (^_^)

aiish i gave so many pep talks i could. like. write a quote book. = / "i wanna see tension, man!" "... that is not cool." "gimme more gimme MORE" "come on guys intenseee" "PUMP IT!" "waitwaitwait someone tying her pants." epicL-O-L. xD

but nehhh no offence meant to any individuals concerned above D: because maybe i don't say it but really i am quite proud of all of you. i think you've all really grown, both in stature and dancing and character and everything and AIISH i didn't scream at ya'll for nothing aiight. because i love dance and i love you guys - i wanna see you enjoy yourself on the 5th of july. and for as long as you're dancing. okay? so. jiayou. hwaiting (:

hahahaha and THANKS SHARON FOR AWESOME CHOREO xD

o.O the student choreo thing is scarryyy. suddenly you see all these flimsy people exploding into some inner gangster D: ithinki'mquitescaredofsomejuniorsnowD: haha YOU GO PEOPLE xD

andand thanks to jiahui for being a really really nice and awesome group leader (:

and for the orange thing. though i didn't wear it = / because i want to preserve it's colour aiight! otherwise it'll end up smeared all over my neck T_T

and finally-

DANCE COMM I LOVE YOU GUYS

<33333333333333333333333333333

you make all the pain worth it. really.

/backtrack a bit to the FOURTEENTH OF JUNE xD

:D thanks to everyone who made it the bestest sixteenth EVERR.

my completely retardedd art budddies + mr ong for rooftop happiness :D i srsly srsly believed we were going to take big bang pictures. D: imma have to shake off this habit of thinking that my whole life is a music video D: scully i take my O levels expect the answer key to come flying by. or something. or worse, start singing DBSK 'O' D:

UNREFORM DELEGATES xD hahaha i've only known you for, what, eight weeks? seen you in person for three days D: and we're still going strong mmm! (: IT'S GOING TO STAY THAT WAY OKAY. stupid jerrell, we're not going to drop out of touch just cuz RMUN high wears off. T_T you'd sooner fail organic chem. T_T YEAH ANYWAY xD thanks for the :D:D:D:D:D manymany birthday scrawls on msn ^^ and wrapped-gift-which-looks-like-a-muffin-and-vice-versa :D and mass convo and everythingg aiiish i love you guys.

special thanks to ros, shil and pek for happiness!lunch xD and everything. it was a lovely

morning. (: andANDmangomadness ^^ <3!

and veryVERY special thanks to my awesome BUDDEEEEEEEEEEE xD because youknowwhy. :D i couldn't ask for an awesomer buddy man. s'gotta be my best blessing ever. along with the watercolour palette, of course xD THANKYOU

and special mention to mommy and daddy for the rest of it xD funding my art-friends-splurge. (: i think at the end of the day i have funky parents la. (i mean how else would JAIMELIEW come around right?! hmm? xD) even though i get locked up at home most of the time. D: etcetc. but YAYNESS. (: the Liew family rocks.

WAHOOOOOOOOOO ART FRIENDS

:D ze arts + friends = LIFE COULDN'T GET BETTER.

from the bottom of my heart.

THANK YOU LORD FOR EVERYTHINGG xD

i am sixteen now!

look who's going to watch lust, caution xD

/and before i end off~

i shall do a spot of advertising. (:

EVERYBODYYY

COME FOR DANCE NIGHT.

come! (:

ever,
the Darkening Dawn

2008-06-13T13:48:00.002+08:00

so art people cannot live together.
okay we knew that already =.=

one/ the internet and no-internet gap is too wide! it's, like, 5m long! o.O
two/ because we are all loud and charismatic individuals with laptops, sooner or later we will all go deaf and then insane from all the different genres of music blaring from all corners of the room =.=
three/ the population is constantly on the verge of imminent starvation due to the open-mindedness and generosity-of-giving-way of the citizens, leading to prolonged and lethal delays in the decision-making process of ordering the whittles, which could lead to FATALITY.
four/ somebody is going to go broke paying for all the Buddy Hoagies escapades that art peeps just have to undertake (Buddy Hoagies being the choice venue for the eventual dinner decision, because as diplomat thiam so aptly put it "got good food and aircon and it's near school. no one talk anymore.")
five/ 一片空白 takes on a new meaning as you stare at the large expanses of white propped up on all the walls, your mind equally and mysteriously blank. prolonged periods of time in the company of art peeps are bound to prolong this state of unproductivness deep thinking and soon we'll all become philosophers on the benefits of meditating on big flat white plains (and when we fail our O level art. hurhur.)

the only good thing about an art community is that you can never take too long naps. because if you don't wake up by random people jumping on you, then you'll wake up to the sound of people playing cyber dress-up-the-noode-girl on mr ong's laptop =_=

...
okay, and there was the lurve. xD

HAHA alright at the end of the day, honestly, sincerely, frankly, from the bottom of my heart...
living with art peeps?
absolutely.

LIFECOULDN'TGETBETTER~
now do your work already la! D:

oh yeah and thanks for the random pre-birthday surprise(s) xD i still think it's amazing how i reached the roof first and somehow, somehow i didn't get on it and discover the -thing- before you guys came up T_T <3!>

/oh well and UNReform update-
i. we celebrate the rise of wenken xD and
ii. hmm. there's no nice way to put it. JAIME+PEARL (?!) o.O [in alphabetical order deariexD]
iii. jerrell (aka mr irockz) is not available anymore, guys ;_; he's just... not interested. D:

what is it with UN people + 1.30a.m. in the morning?! huh?

/TODAY IS THE FIRST WEEKDAY IN THE HOLIDAYS THAT I GET TO SPEND AT HOME ENTIRELY xD a toast is in order!

/and ZOMG
it's FRIDAY THE 13TH.
i knew there had to be a reason why i couldn't get out of bed in the morning T_T
oh, wait, that's because i didn't have to go to school for the first time in this lousy excuse of a holiday.
<3 to friday the 13th cuz of that xD

AND BECAUSE TODAY IS FRIDAY THE THIRTEENTH
GUESS WHAT IS UP TOMORROW PEOPLE! hmm? xD

ever,
the Darkening Dawn

2008-06-09T23:50:00.002+08:00

Aiight so I haven't blogged forever.

*dusts off cobwebs*

well first things first! (:

happy birthday boss! tangshin-eun SARANGHAEYO yeongweonhi! xD thanks for being an awesome awesome awesome friend throughout this year and the last and the one before that. you are <3333>

and
happy birthday thiam! CHOAYO xD one of my dearest Art Friends. what would i do without you man. hahaha today's "surprise" was sooo screwed. but oh well ^^

and moving on~

/RMUN. boy did i NOT know what i was getting myself into when THIS happened D: before i knew it, we were all labelled 'delegates'. delegate wong, delegate choi, delegate lee, delegate tan, delegate liew xD of the Germs Institution. totally man. and then suddenly - wham, 10 msn convos a night, with people i'd never met before in my entire life. ooh scary. but WOOHOO cool. (:

and of course, starting from day one, i was completely in a knot. well at least my tie was. T_T thank goodness for delegate koh of the mexican delegation. or i'd have gone around looking like an idiot, proudly displaying delegate wong's masterpiece of a tie-turned-bowtie =_=

/Well really, there's nothing much to it - apart from the public speaking, the dashing up of resolutions at 1am in the morning just so our dear Germany can have a non-existent permanent seat =.= - RMUN was fantastic. If only just for the company of my beloved awesome awesome awesome awesome AWESOME fellow UNReformers. Thanks to you guys, instead of stoning like dearest Croatia xD, I spent the two-and-a-half days sniggering away into the sleeve of my blazer. (Or La's blazer. Thanks for the clothes, doode. ^^) I won't go into names but hey - "1.3 billion is a heck. lotta people" - classic "The delegate of Serbia is tired, bored and confused" - all-time-favourite "therefore, delegates, in the light of world peace and progress, I urge-" - and WTH?! tulips T_T

If only the countries of the world had delegates like you guys man. The world would be such a better place. (Okay I know I said that on the forums. But good things bear repeating. xD)

SO ANYWAY IN CONCLUSION-
UNReformers, ILOVEYOUGUYS.
For everything, kamsahamnida xD
Much <3 is in order! (:

So yeah, despite my huge pile of Physics Chem Chinese Math AMath SocialStudies HalfHistory 01000101010111100101 =.=, my 1.6m-tall board-which-is-2cm-taller-than-me-and-which-I-need-to-sell-my-soul-to-in-order-to-finish-PAINTINGMYCOURSEWORK >_<, the Grand Total of three. free days in my whole slashed-and-bleeding June holidays (which includes Saturdays)...

Yeah well. I suppose life really couldn't get better.
(:

Fyi, I'm taking a small hiatus off Koreanism. The big O looms ever nearer.

Well everyone!
MODEUNSARAMDEUL - JAL JUMUSEYO! (: MAEIL HAENGBOKAN YEONGWEONHI~

'night!
zeDarkeningDawn

2008-05-18T21:31:00.006+08:00

life on hold.

SO! when you're talking to O Levelszzxx and Life is going to put down the phone on you, what do you need?

the LIFE!HIATUS SURVIVAL KIT:

1. mp3 loaded to max. limit with korean/jap songs xD - for on the way home

2. brains loaded with EHB episodes for instant laughter

3. brains imprinted with images of top looking completely todiefor in a shopping cart with funky turquoise sunglasses for instant feel-good moments

4. A:SLFKJALASJA just start thinking in korean already! >= /

and i just found out that i don't have to upload pics onto photobucket to upload them here. T_T and then discover that they're too big, resize them in adobe photoshop and upload them again, to upload them here. T_T i am such an IT noob it scares me. scares you?

so anyway - putting newfound skills to the test...

MY NEW OBSESSION:

U-KNOW YUNHO HWAITING.

wah lau everytime also have to bring the pic all the way from the top of the post! D: i hate technology. no wait i take that back. without technology there'd be no globalization and without globalization I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW THE GUY. D: horror. i'm never thinking about that again.

and just because:

MY FIRST LOVE.

teukie pwn.

okay just taking a breather from koreanism for a bit -

for all the art peeps out there, you need to know - OIL PAINTS ROCK THE JUNK OUTTA YOUR TRUNK. :D it blends sooooooooo well. unlike our old friend acrylic paint. blend halfway already dry up. D: so YES. xD oil paints are good for the soul.

unfortunately-

painting with oil paint is like cooking. i kid you not.

weelll... using up a tenth of your shampoo to get the oil out of your brush/palette/hair/face/hands/legs, or spending a hundred times that amount of time trying to get different acrylic colours to get along on your drawing block? the choice is yours.

ANNYEONGHIKYESEYO!

theDARKENINGdawn

2008-05-06T00:48:00.003+08:00

firstly i would like to establish my undying love for super junior.

secondly i would like to say...

u-know yunho ILOVEYOU ARGH.
i'll say it again in korean so you know exactly what i mean.

u-know yunho, tangshin-eun sarang hamnida YEONGWEONHI.

plz to be returning my heart soon.

either that or

SOMEONE PLZ TO BE TEACHING ME THE BLEEDING PURPLE LINE DANCE SO I CAN JUSTIFY MY EXISTENCE IN LIFE.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

and one more time in jap in case you're in tokyo and lost and pretending to be a jap:
u-know yunho o ashiteru.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

i don't care IMMA LEARN THE @#£$%^&* BY THE END OF JUNE HOLS.
now THAT is a resolution.

aiish apart from that and all,
YAY to bat! because i just feel like saying that. (O-O-O HAHAHA let'sdothis! xD)
and WTH?! to boss! because you're such an idiot i can't believe you BOUGHT ME ANOTHER PEANUT SESAME BALL. after i vowed never to let you do that again. T_T may I'M the idiot. T_T

and to everybody, because i'm relatively happy and 100% joyful and LIFECOUDLN'TGETBETTER:

I MODEUNSARAM NAEIL CHEIL CHOUN CHINGU IMNIDA.
i love ya'll!

the Darkening "Delegate Liew" Dawn.

2008-05-02T22:02:00.002+08:00

to all my art comrades:
i love you guys.

just. srsly. what would i do without all of you. idek.

going into an art exam with all of you is like going into a concentration camp with the best company. ever.

i think i would be completely nazified and hard of heart by now if i didn't have all of you to remind me that Buddy Hoagies would be there after the battle and accompany me there after that.

i think of all of you and i think life couldn't get better.

(bat if you're reading this, same goes for you too. cuz you're always always always always always there even though you don't gotta be and aiish ilusm i'm in danger of being converted to japanese. which btw is saying a lot a lot ^^

haha buddy if you're reading this too, you know it all - buddysquared is love. xD)

<3<3<3!!!

oh and mr ong! i finished with ten minutes to go (actually half an hour budden i see everyone so stressed out i paint slower so they not so pressurized) xD aren'tyouproudofme!(:

MODEUNSARAM SARANGHAMNIDA YEONGWEONHI!

<3 the darkening dawn

2008-04-28T20:43:00.002+08:00

PRZ TO BE MAKING SINGAPORE COOLER SOON

i mean yeah i know singaporeans are awful hot and all, but we're just getting that little bit too hot for our own good -

it's time to swing to the other side of the equation. cool is the new hot. and right now we're really not hot at all.

heeeelpzzxx

HOW TO STUDY LIDDIS. >_<

the darkening dawn

2008-04-26T21:31:00.002+08:00

103 words

Speed test

i can't help it. it's addictive.

'sides the gahmen is always making us strive for new frontiers, no? ^^

imustabeenborntodresslikeageek.

aiish.

the darkeningdawn

2008-04-18T15:56:00.003+08:00

it's friday again! ARGH this week was such a bummer. hardly got any studying done. and art =X

AII anyway the other day. Bat and I were going home. The FIRST time Bat and I actually go home together EARLY so for the very FIRST time we sit on a beatiful chuggy old 852, which is beautiful to me because it always has seats for those who need them.

I suppose everyone knows what they mean when I say people who need seats, because I've said this a thousand times before and I probably won't stop saying it until I get into Parliament and make the necessary changes to our sorely lacking public transport system such that the younger generation doesn't die like seeds planted in rocks.

So we stare at one of those "Give Up This Seat To Those Who Need It" stickers. I think these stickers are pretty good stuff; it does cause you that pang of guilt as you feign sleep that just might induce you to give up your seat for utilitarian gain. BUT. As I have said many many times previously, these stickers always fail to include one very glaringly obvious faction in this society who need those seats;

i.e. students with heavy bags and files.

Seriously. Back to those stickers. We see four main pictures: one of a hunchbacked old man, one of a heavily pregnant lady, one of a lady with a kid, and one of a blind man with a walking stick. While I do concede that these are people who all do need seats on public buses, the burdens of students with heavy bags and files cannot be easily underestimated. We are not ailed by age, we are not (heaven forbid) pregnant, we do not (ditto) have kids, we are not blind (I can't imagine). But somehow the side-effects of education render us as helpless as these four examples of needy people. I do not exaggerate when I say that our youth is no shield against the deadweight of schoolbags pressing against our spines (grab any Secondary-and-above school kid's bag - sometimes even Primary, too - and you'll find that most bags don't come below a minimum of 2kg, which if carried throughout an average of a 30-min bus ride can be a severe pain in the neck - literally). I do not boast when I say that the armful of books and files that we lug home to cram later is as severe an inconvenience in any vanguard movement as a swollen abdomen (it doesn't help that this load can be dropped on the ground in true nerd fashion either; extra energy is required to keep a firm hold on this squarish and extremely uncomfortable load). This very same load does not do good things for our line of vision either; often, on top of having to concentrate on not spilling anything on the floor, the pile of books renders two metres of the floor in front of us invisible; the crucial two metres that determines walk or trip, descend or fall, life or death. In the midst of this whole concoction, students often have to carry extra loads - for co-cirricular activities and or recycling projects and the likes - in the form of numerous plastic bags (bursting at the seams), paper bags (in no better condition), or otherwise long, inconvenient equpiment like wushu swords or bulky instruments such as cello cases - with the cello inside(which, from what I have seen my friends go through, is a true pain in the a** to carry around).

Students: bumps front and back, more stuff in tow, and a crippling effect to essential survival senses (such as sight and touch). This is apart from the physical pain that ensues as a result of prolonged strain on various parts of the body ferrying all this educational equpiment around. Is it not then natural, obvious that such students as we should receive a seat offered in good will? I pause short of waxing lyrical about the torture we put ourselves through everyday and put in a word for the general public. Despite my annoyance at the general public's lack of compassion and understanding for such burdened youngsters (jostling for standing space and squeezing mercilessly past our bulkened bodies, often dislodging many a precariously-balanced item), I cannot help but sympathize with them - after all, we students, covered with all these assets as we are (and not just in terms of human form, either), pose a serious blockage to traffic flow up and down bus corridors. SBS buses especially have ridiculously narrow passages that do absolutely no good to a worn-out crew of Singaporeans young and old just trying to get comfortable on the way back home. Logic dictates that such human inconveniences should be safely deposited on a seat, luggage and all, simply for the utilitarian comfort of the rest of the public.

I see students weighed down by books and bags and badder. I see their minds dulled by physical suffering. I see their potential limited by an unforgiving environment.

I see also that no one else sees.

And they call us the leaders of the future.

Some kind of future you're going to have, kids. You're going to be ruled by a bunch of grumpy, backbent old hags and hazards.

Oh well. Crap happens.

- the Darkening Dawn.

2008-04-11T20:21:00.002+08:00

aiish i'm so completely shacked out i could kill myself. T_T and i srsly hate falling asleep nowadays. cuz i have about a thousand chapters of chem, physics and math to study. and social studies killer. and history. and lit. aaaaaaand...

art. T_T

i need to get a life./-

anyways~

HWAITING FOR EXAMS EVERYONE!!!
chill, eat, and sleep. and don't follow whatever rubbish example i'm setting.

�� ູ��
(and everyone in this world looks happy)
i wanna thank you baby

a miracle.
- the Darkening Dawn

2008-03-30T16:45:00.002+08:00

Well anyway so after I tell my mom I'm doing my homework I decide to blog. Okay. I have a rotten heart and a non-existent conscience and a very, very good sense of street-smartness.

But I can't help it. I need to tell the world.

it's. over.

GCE 'O' LEVEL HIGHER ART PAPER IS O.V.E.R.

And I've gotten about 5 hours of sleep in the last three days (4am, 3am, non-applicable), and I've probably flunked my sleep MSG so badly that if this were a real test and there were real people up in the clouds tabulating our mean-sleep-grade per week and judging us accordingly, I'd probably be retaking the test over and over for the rest of my life (not that it's a test I mind retaking though). As of last Sunday night, 2am, 3am, 1.30am, 11.30am, 4am, 3am, nada. I swear my head feels distinctly lighter from all the dead-and-gone brain cells.

Mm. Before I lose it completely, I wanna do a quick round of thank-yous! - to BAT because she listens to my crap everytime all the time (and it's not like she has much time to begin with in the first place), cuz she offered her printing services to me even though I didn't take up the offer in the end (cuz of my family's fatal pride in our own in-house printer T_T) but which made all the difference because knowing that I had a plan B and a friend in this world carried me through all the way; BATRISHIYA O AISHITERU - to all my fellow higher art survivors because together we are unstoppable and because I love you all whatever - to KAT cuz she gave me the courage to go and proclaim my love for SUJU again by getting SIX!xD more of THOSE things xD from you-know-where - to STONG cuz yeah well for (near) infinite patience and for (xD) dessert! - and of COURSE THANK YOU LORD BECAUSE I KNOW WITHOUT YOU MY LAST BRAIN CELL WOULD'VE DIED OF LONELINESS. Cuz without You I'd just have lost the will to live by now.

Random!special thanks to Charlene, my awesome new seating partner, because she makes school really, really, reeaaaaaalllllllllyyyyyy realxed. I srsly don't know what *ahem* was trying to accomplish when she put us together because we're srsly, srsly, ssrrssllyy just taking it eeeasy. Saranghae!

Okay I can feel my brain shutting down. BYE ALL

dancing out on the edge~
the Darkening Dawn.

2008-03-25T20:45:00.002+08:00

i've noticed my posts are getting shorter and shorter. it's the age of one-liners.

so, if i could sum up this post in one line, it'd be...

english is so not my thing.

ARGH.

my top ten favourite songs are all NOT english.

spanish. french. italian. jap. KOREAN. even sanskrit. and some made-up language by some new age group.

everything BUT english. unless it's enya. but enya doesn't count because i can't hear a single word she sings. same goes for tori amos.

one day i'm just going to shut my mouth and pretend that i only speak korean.

help.

the DARKENING DAWN

2008-03-21T22:40:00.003+08:00

99 words

Speedtest

okay, so i'm out of inspiration for Higher Art.
(but that doesn't mean i haven't been racking my brains the entire day trying to complete it! and i WILL! (and why do i always have to put a footnote to Mr Ong explaining why i do the things i do ALL THE TIME?!))

and okay so i have a primary-school-typing-fast-is-cool complex.

but who cares! i type 99 words a minute.
can YOU do that?

xD

hahaha ANNYEONG!
the darkening dawn

2008-03-19T20:37:00.002+08:00

resolutions are made to be broken.

ah quote the wise words of nuttilie wong.

so therefore.

i shall make a... determination.

ah henceforth am determined to:
become a half-lifer for the coupla weeks before my higher art report is due. this will include not sleeping, spending free periods doing work, spending youtube and fanficcing time doing work as well, [doing my best to] stop sleeping doing class, studying like a... like half a nat wong (because i'm currently on a half-lifer and doing a complete nat-wong study routine will just make it a complete no lifer), etc etc etc the works - oh, and not eating as well, just so that my life can suck even more. get the whole job done, y'know. full package.

i hate it already.

i like my hedonism policy much much more.

AHH and i FINALLY got reunited with my mp3. *kisseu* ^^

aiish i'm completely not blogging intelligently la. sorry for lack of substance. but i just needed to make my determinations public so that the public-excluding-mrong-because-mrong-would-just-put-me-off-my-determinations-completely can remind me that i actually made a Determination.

LIFE COULDN'T GET BETTER (hey!) [at least i keep telling myself that]
nan nol pume ango nara
purun dahrul hyanghe nara (ho!)
jam dun noui ib machul koya
LIFE COULDN'T GET BETTER (hey!)
noui mame munul yoro jyo
geudae ne sonul jabayo

life couldn't get better.

[paksu! applause!]

at this point i just wanna thank super junior because it's that song and nearly that song alone (nearly cuz obviously "keeping jaime alive" has to be completely credited to our Father in the end xD) which has been getting me through the past few weeks.

aiish.

yeongweonhi
the darkening dawn.

2008-03-15T09:58:00.002+08:00

is it just me or what...?

if i can't sing along to any song i hear cuz i don't know the lyrics, i consider it wasted.

it doesn't help that suju's songs are mostly (or slight-less-than-all) korean and that tablo raps so effing (!) fast. in korean. T_T

it also doesn't help that suju's dance cuts are so amazing, i can barely keep my eyes on the lyrics for fear of missing out on all the little little things that make suju wayy-over-the-top awesome. (stuff like how sungmin's awesome hair flops all over his face when he does one move in the don't don mv. or how teukie has this totally uncharacteristic but undeniably sexy down-the-nose look at the "boom" part before henry lau comes on. oh and henry lau is definitely one section that can't be missed either. and how teukie waves at you for a split second in the miracle mv. i always find that the next line of lyrics after that is forever stuck in my throat.) i mean yeah definitely want (need!) to get the lyrics right but aiish! doesn't help that if i don't WATCH the mv and pretend that i'm picking up moves, i also consider it wasted. T_T my life is full of conflicting intentions.

and the language barrier is annoying. i can't use online dictionaries because i don't know how to write the [insert swearword] characters in the first place! i mean there are like three different ways to write the letter t or k or something like that and a thousand permutations of how to write one stupid syllable and therefore a million different ways to write a WORD. i need classes. (and new glasses too i expect, what with all the hardcore cyber-fandoming i've been indulging in.)

ah whatever la. i'm off to read more fanfic. xD

annyeonghikasaeyo!
saranghae,
the Darkening Dawn.

2008-03-10T19:58:00.002+08:00

ack. my brain is totally burnt out from *illegal number* hours of hardcore *illegal activity*-ing. aish but i'm happy man.

NEE-WAYS!

i shall dedicate this post to none other than my completely awesome band(age) crew members. specifically my band(age) pub comm. members, for whom there can be no replacement.

umm. where do i begin.

the stuff we did was just so effing lame, i think i WOULD be seriously (ah-shincha-yo!) emotionally scarred for ever if not for the company. on the contrary i think the past few days were the best times i've ever had for a long time.

the jingle. oh man the jingle. doodes that was a complete stroke of genius. all the information stuck in one idiotic, annoying, rhyming poem. i just wonder how people're going to remember us. xD we sec four leh! k la but sec four supposed to do significant things. "embarrassed ourselves publicly in front of the whole school", check.

fast-forward to audi deco.
...
i got nothing to say except-
"EVERYWHERE WE GO~
PEOPLE WANT TO KNOW
WHY THE FLOOR LIDDAT~
SO WE TELL THEM
YOU DON'T NEED TO KNOW..."
haha i destroyed two band(age) shirts already la! >_< size="2">and sann's piglet. sorry sorry sorry sorry >_<
and the grunge stars.
"it was on purpose la!"
(yeah right.)
i remember the first "brainwave".
abby and jaime happyhappy transporting a banner to the grass patch to dry/
wind blows/
[freeze scene]
"LIFE COULDN'T GET BETTER~~"
ahahaha and the real purposeful "grunging" seriously began when our very own HYUNG-NIM dao chang!
like abby said.
"this is zoe on a normal day. she see the grunge stars, she start screaming 'AHHH WHY LIDDAT?!?! oh man it looks like crap!' (or something to that effect)."
and what did zoe on a pubcommistreatedlikeshhh-ahhcannotsay day?
"ey quite nice eh!"
and the star incident. zoe tey produced (as in drew, cut and painted) a cardboard star that was seriously koyak. the top point was bent to one side. for further imagery, just imagine Patrick the starfish from spongebob squarepants.
abby: "this is zoe on a normal day. she see this kind of star, she will yell 'oh man WHAT HAPPEN? throw it away la!'"
zoe tey on a pubcommistreatedlike-somethingthatrhymeswithmisfit day: [very serious] no really you see this star? it looks like it's bowing to you, right?
AHHAHAHAHA after that we officially certified her hyunghyungnimnim. [note hyung means older brother in korean. joke came about because sandra seriously couldn't take the concept of "grunge stars". so abby say "sandra. guys like grunge stars. we are just getting into the mindset of guys." and i point at her and yell "HYUNG!" - yeah but i'm older la. and i'd know because, well, her birthday is on the seventeenth of september and i'd know that because, well, haha i er play neopets. ^^ hacked her account. ANYWAY sandra chua ah. don't you know suju is always changing their image. i mean look at what happened to their hair in don't don. similarly, as hardcore suju fans we must always be open to new ideas and concepts! xD then you will be a true dongsaeng ^^]
HWAITING HYUNG NIM-AH!

aii pub comm srsly... we were made to make, put up and *swallows hard* take down the deco on the same day. srsly la OUCH.

and all the records we set man.

Left The Greatest Mark On The School Building Award
hmm i wonder why people still haven't noticed the *beep* in the *beep*. so big and yet people make us clean the thousand times smaller black drops of paint right next to it. humans are so weird xD i just hope people don't notice the *beep* on the *beep* on the grass patch. ^^
Did The Stupidest Things Ever For Publicity Award
enough said la.
Stayed Back In School Latest To Finish A Job Award
of course this is all relative la. i mean we WERE the latest to go home on friday - 11.30 p.m. sandra and i were having a nap on the art room tables after lugging all the half-finished deco up to the art room. haha i keep wondering what would have happened if mrs chen hadn't found us there. prolly'd have camped out there overnight and gone home after the concert at whatever time we went home on the next day - which incidentally, was a little past 12a.m.

and of course -
Best Budget Production Award.
i think it started with the banner. because i said that stupid line concerning where we going to get money for the banner - "You won't know about it."
after that everything also save cost. painted the banner with lethal wall paint and left a super big impression at X.
make the goliath plasters also save cost. begged the popular peeps at btp for their old cardboard boxes and abigail went digging around in the recycling bin under the staircase for more old cardboard boxes.
buy stiff black paper in the end also buy the more flaccid kind. cuz why? seventy cents cheaper.
white drapes for the audi also come free from the drama club.
travel to btp also must walk.
buy lunch also must eat at hawker centre. if not then get wholesale from supermarket.
hanging up decoration also have to work in the dark.
srsly la i think we saved over a hundred bucks with all that saving.

HAHA i think we were the ones who laughed the hardest when we saw what was for dinner man - innocent chicken rice - "haha construction worker food" - and even more so on the day before, where we got some seriously suspicious looking rendang with rice and veggie for dinner. it was brown, sludgy, and it looked just like - "PUB COMM FOOD!!!!!" "AHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA!!!"

and the bu liang shao nian from pub comm also. i stare at [read: admire] my blackened "hand of glory" after painting all the black stars on the white drapes. "wah i look like some chain smoker"
and of course abigail say "haha we look like drunkards man! later when ms lau come you pretend to smoke zoe you sniff the paint and-" running out of ideas, abby, sann and min feng just roll around the ground in the normal pub comm-esque manner.

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA aii i think at the end of the day, i wouldn't trade my pub comm job for ANYTHING.

to abigail: you were a BRILLIANT ic, i couldn't say this enough times okay maybe i can but AH SHINCHA-YO i mean it you were BRILLIANT. srsly surpassed expectations. from the beginning man you even had a PROPOSAL for how the banner should look like. annen you always forking out the money for whatever materials we bought. annen bringing pineapple tarts on saturday - FULL MARKS FOR WELFARE OF MEMBERS MAN!!! haha and sharing your lunch one saturday later for our breakfast. y' really didn't need to but you did! xD and taking the initiative to go and tie everything to the aircon- sann and i were saying you were up there for like FOREVER and yeah you really gave your all for the pub comm man especially since most of your members were um really really scared of heights (okay maybe just me. oh no wait sandra too! yeah anyway proves my point.)
mm yeah anyway just - a really big THANK YOU! i don't think we could have done it without any one of us but most of all we couldn't have pulled through without an awesome leader - always first to chiong into the fire, trusted her members and to top it off all knew the lyrics to MIRACLE! - what more could i want? xD

and to everyone ELSE even though i know you're not going to read this - thanks to min feng who made the vids, who endured our korean spazzes and got her hands dirty in the end even though she was the one who didn't even begin on the change to hyung-ism, to our very own beloved HYUNG-NIM [zoe is no more] who was always a catalyst for leaving your members rolling around the floor nearly unconscious from laughter, and who also had to endure korean spazzes BUT who still learnt the tune to our theme song "miracle" and you still love us don't you? (: - and finally to sandra chua, cuz you were always there when i just couldn't take the pubcomm-ness of it all sometimes, and cuz you were a fantastic DJ. xD y'know i'm really... startingtolikeDBSKnow. AHHHHH

hahaha ANYWAY! basically, THANK YOU ALL FOR EVERYTHING!! for all the fun and love and building-of-abs; seriously i couldn't have gotten a better workout on the stomach muscles doing crunches.

SARANGHAEYO YEONGWEONHI!
[for min feng and zoe respectively who don't really subsribe to korean-ism (though for zoe that's going to change soon): "I LOVE YOU!" and "AISHITERU!"]

you guys are the best.
and for that just a big KAMSAHAEYO!!

other credits: thanks yiling for being a GREAT overall ic. you did your best for band(age) and all of us could really see that. thanks for the flowers! oh and thanks mr ong for being the first photographer for pub comm's first photoshoot xD

<3
the DARKENING "i have sold my soul to pub comm and i don't regret it" DAWN.

2008-03-05T22:19:00.002+08:00

the term's going to be over. in a blink of an eye... and we're going to change seats. again.

so in loving memory of my sojourn as an installation next to nat w. -

Conversation [albeit a really short one]
[after a particularly exhausting social studies lesson]
nat w: social studies is so hard. it's like history. history is really hard! it's like... literature. literature is really hard - it's like MEP! MEP is really hard, it's like art. and art is really hard, it's like... LIFE. and life is like...
me: death?
nat w: yeah exactly!

ahh nat wong ah nat wong. i'll miss sitting next to you man. up to now [?!] still don't remember/can't get over the fact that i take FULL literature. eejit.

Recollection [albeit an annoying one]
nat w: [busily copying literature notes from Whose Life Is It Anyway - busily copying MY literature notes from Whose Life Is It Anyway] Do you take full lit?
me: y'think?

and all your words of the day. why suddenly stop eh?! it was educational.

favourite word of the day: huckleberry. usage [from official Nat W use-the-word-of-the-day-la!-dictionary]: don't huckle my berry!

but of course y'all know my secret favourite word of the day is harakiri. because it's just so apt in describing what school life feels like. "school life feels like you're plunging a dagger into your stomach and dragging it across your belly with sadomasochistic sounds of pleasure emnating from your mouth"

and if there's one thing you taught me about life [with you], it's that you can never take enough salt when you're talking to nat w.

[in school one day, morning before assembly, one blue monday]
me: AHHH!!! I JUST FOUND OUT ABOUT THE @#£$%^&* CHINESE CI YU TEST TODAY!!! [note: chinese ci yu tests are one of a kind. the s&m lao shi tells you which lesson from the textbook is tested, you pore over the text wielding a highlighter to jab away at every single ci yu which you think looks suspiciously difficult and sophisticated enough to come out in a test, and spend the rest of your night and coffee memorizing every. single. thing. oh and if you have time after that, go online to compare whose list is longer. T_T in other words, never study = kanasai.]
nat w: YEAH! did she write it on the board? NO! [actually after that we found out that it WAS on the board, only in minute lao-shi-esque squiggly chinese words unreadable from our sitting position] did she announce it at all? NO!
me: [starts feeling better] YEAH! what kinda rubbish! [li zhi qi zhuang de slam fist on the table.] can you believe it i only knew about it like NOW!
nat w: YEAH ME TOO! i only found out about it on friday.

i'm used to it.

and the communal great wall of china! awesome for making good use of one's time during particularly unproductive [read: boring] lessons.

and everything else.

thanks doode. [robohug] - because nat w is autistic and hates to be touched.

and of course i didn't forget DAPHNE NG, my other wonderful seating partner! haha although i didn't understand most of your math explanations, THANKS for all the patience and whatevers. you're much nicer than what people make you out to be. so yeah it's been AWESOME and i give you my blessing as i sends you forth into the world with your OWN a math textbook ^^ hwaiting!

to both of you: SARANGHAMNIDA.

don't forget me! ^^

ahh good heavens i sound like some.. ?! jaimeliew we're only changing seats. T_T srsly.

but WHO CARES.

^^

ahh~ today after a LOOOOOOOOOONG LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG time, my dear boss-hyung finally FINALLY FINALLY~~~~~~~~~ went out with me. xD for sacrificing your time and energy and everything, THANK YOU. iloveyouiloveyouiloveyou! (((((((((((:

and BAT! haha THANKS for letting me load all my crap onto you every single monday. i know i disrupt your work a lot even though you adamantly refuse to admit it. i don't believe. weelll anyway just t' let you know - you make my day every day i talk to you. (:

oh and lastly - WELCOME BACK MR ONG. it was real painful without you man. art just wasn't as fun. so yeah. and don't worry your hair will grow back. xD

HONEY!! if you're reading this, the lagsane you made was AWESOME. i dreamt about it in the night.

and YAY i finally declared my true love in comics connection today! comics connection peeps, i know you made a lot of money out of me+DBSK, but i'm tellin' ya now i belong with SUPER JUNIOR alone. (so can you please please restock on suju stickers? i mean now that i've got your entire present stock sitting on my table at home? i need t' spread the love to other people!)

ah well! xD cya everyone!

GOODNIGHT!
annyeong!

<3
Darkening "St. Luke's HOORAY TICKETS ARE SOLD OUT" Dawn

2008-03-03T00:19:00.002+08:00

I've given my life to St. Luke's man. I wonder if they know. Just exactly how much grey matter I've sacrificed for all the ahgong ahma there burning up my entire stock of midnight oil trying to dash up @#£$%^&* pub posters. Not saying that I don't want to do my bit for charity but... Srsly? Doodes does THIS look like cheerful giving of free will?

I've lost so many brain cells I swear I can feel my head growing lighter and lighter. The Cell Countdown is going to go on and on and on until one day, I wake up in bed and find that I don't have enough brainpower to remind me that my name is Jaime Liew Hui Xin, my toast is waiting for me and I'm actually a human being with a life albeit one that sucks.

Because yes, one fine day I'm going to open my eyes and discover that my grand cell count totals up to ONE.

I find myself thinking a lot about how life will be like with ONE brain cell. Chem teachers always tell you that it takes a good hard knock for two particles to react. I imagine myself desperately banging my head on the table in a last-ditch attempt to figure out the answer to 1+1=? and if that last brain cell happened to hail from my right brain, heaven help my math because I forsee myself happily scribbling down the answer, "11".

Imagine if EVERYONE had only one brain cell left. "Brainstorming" would take on a completely different meaning. To "get the sparks going", we'd have to "put our heads together" - hard - in the hope of getting any kind of "brainwave".

Metal skull plates would become a government-issue thing from birth. In every organization, everyone takes turns at "Thinking". Construction workers would find a whole new in-demand job, what with their yellow "Thinking Caps" all ready to be put to a wholly different use for the good of the society.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I don't waaaannnnt!!!!!!!!!!!!! *clutches head in terror* get away from my brain cells, all you!

I begin to sympathize with Magneto's fetish for archaic-looking bronze helmets.

St. Luke's what have you done to me?

AHHH I just thought of something - y'know how I say "I hold up my life before me sometimes like a torn and tattered shirt" - WELL I had a nightmare Saturday night (or more like Sunday morning) about how - how. The BAND(AGE)SHIRTSCAMEOUTALLSCREWEDUP. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH yeah and how the orange became a horrible peachy coral colour and how some parts of people's shirt wouldn't "DOWNLOAD" and so there were huuuge patches of white and everything and AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH omtomtomtomt.

=X

There goes my childhood man. My only chance of ever experiencing first-hand the "innocence" and "bliss" and everything of childhood so I can contrast it against my pathetic adult life when I grow up so I can write proper novels juxtaposing childhood and adulthood like every pro writer DOES! Danggit why does life have to make things so difficult for everyone man. SRSLY. GET A LIFE.

Aiii.

Life.

Enough said.

JAL JUMUSAEYO.

SARAMMADA SARANGHAE!

HWAITING!

HAENGBOK YEONGWEONHI.

annyeong!

- Darkening "St. Luke's" Dawn

2008-02-29T22:57:00.002+08:00

come for band(age), it's so fun!
it's something for EVERYONE.
in the audi, 8 of March-
tickets are not free-of-charge!
15 bucks to come and see
the show will start at SEVEN THIRTY!
free seating so come early
do your part for CHA-RI-TY!
help the people in St. Luke's
ahgong ahma all so CUTESSZZXX!!!!

there it's on my blog, my msn nickname, my msn personal message. i've scarred myself emotionally twice telling people about this shiro band concert. mm, what else can i do? shall i just tattoo it on my forehead while i'm at it?

AIYA COME FOR BAND(AGE)! it's an MGS FUNDRAISING PROJECT IN AID OF THE ST. LUKE'S HOSPITAL, which is an organization dedicated to providing quality healthcare services to patients requiring long-term but not so hi-tech care. every year mgs holds a fundraising event to support St. Luke's financially and this year, we give you BAND(AGE)! featuring bands from schools all over Singapore, it's going to be a thrilling night of fun and music.

I'm going. She's going. EVERYBODY'S going. Are YOU going?

*plasters a "come hither" look on the face* come on. it'll be fun... i promise.

GRAB YOUR TICKETS NOW!

i'm going to bed.
ANNYEONGHIKASEYO!
sarang,
the DARKENING DAWN.

2008-02-20T18:41:00.002+08:00

woah it's been a completely @#£$%^&* week man. totally 100% fubar.

haha i was walking home and i was thinking of the time when i went with liana chek to get cheapo prizes for LTC from a wholesaler, this funny old chinese guy with the look of a prosperous towkay.

“你们是从哪里来的？”
“美以美女校”
“噢，那么你们都很美，是吗？”
[捧腹大笑]
“啊，对对对。”

after that i kenna slapped by liana chek. T_T

but he was really a very nice guy. minus GST plus "stooden discount"! (((((:
(of course maybe it was just us la but i'll give him the credit ^^)

recently life's not bittersweet anymore - it's sweet and sour. but sometimes not sweet and sour, even. sometimes i wonder where the sugar went.

but speaking of sugar, ARGH I AM GOING ON A FREAKING DIET OKAY!

MOMMY HEARD THAT. T_T no, my clothes are fudging cool kay and no, contrary to [your] belief i CAN actually fit into them T_T and no, the only reason why you think i'm fat is cuz the rest of the family is anorexic and it especially looks that way when i stand next to budd, who has no lipids to speak of whatsoever but WHO CARES, i'll go on a diet anyway. T_T

and everyone else who's read this you're supposed to stop me from eating my 2nd/3rd/4th helping of food wherever i go.

oh yeah - HAPPY BIRTHDAY GRACE FONG! i know you ain't reading this but oh well happy birthday anyway and I LOVE YOU! and yesyes i know your present is late - as usual - but i swear i'll get it to you by the end of... um. February. promise. =X

sann get well soon and stop moping around the school with your Nine Thunderclouds of Heaven.

av honey, just go to youtube and type in "E.H.B ep 1 eng sub". there's part 1 2 3 4 and some episodes there are 5 or 6 or 7 parts i think i'm not sure but you're smart enough to figure it all out, so ALL THE WAY and get some suju love man.

mr ong you didn't tell your replacement teacher that we're allowed to go at 4.30? i think she was real mad when we told her we ought to leave at 4.30 especially cuz most of us were unprepared to do prepwork till 6. =X and also cuz you weren't there playing lameo music. happy reservicing ^^

cya peeps!
xD
the DARKENING DAWN

2008-02-12T20:14:00.000+08:00

i just don't know how to show my love sometimes.

2008-02-06T21:44:00.001+08:00

saturday was super retarded.

T_T

go xanga.com/tastebuddy to see why.

-

well anyway i thought i oughtta say. miracles DO happen xD thank GOD they do, really really thank you thank you thank you THANK YOU. xD so yeah freaking out over art again, @#£$%^&* drawing and painting test with accompanying @#£$%^&* prepwork which takes so long to do, if i still had my perfectionist habits i'd still be doing last year's drawing and painting exam prepwork now. much less THIS round of prepwork. spent saturday and sunday convincing myself (while doing the prepwork la!) that it's okay don't panic you already lost enough years of your life worrying and staying up to miss maldives going underwater permanently. but, i tell myself, on monday i have dance until 5 and heaven knows it's NOT going to end at five, it never does, by the time i'm done packing my bag and got my ass home it's going to be effing SEVEN and what superhuman finishes prepwork starting from seven?! oh jaime liew, did you forget about the chinese ci yu test on tuesday, yeah you know THOSE ci yu tests where you study the textbook like the Bible, use your intuition and paranoia to highlight every single word you think may come out and memorise it? those?

there've been times where i needed a miracle before. i added another one to the list just by trying to get through Megadeath Monday. been through frenzied despair before but it hasn't helped with learning how to bear with it and somehow lately i just can't bring myself to stay up the whole night anymore. stupid human with stupid human problems but ARGH, it's doesn't make it any less painful to get through it. T_T

so YES! can you BELIEVE it - a total miracle - xie tian xie di -

there.
was.
no.
dance.

cancelled. zaki not coming. i could've cried for relief 'cept for the fact that my juniors were the ones bringing the tidings of great joy and i sure wasn't going to disgrace myself in front of them ^^ said a cynical "hallelujah." but @#£$%^&*! i REALLY meant it. could i have survived without that man. without my dear Father's help. /could i survive without air, or food, or yakult? - no i'm just kidding. how can our need for him be compared to yakult cravings. i know i'm not really a good christian or anything but when you get this crystal clear message that God cares for you how can you not just feel like jumping into the air singing "better than life"? xD

awesome stuff man.

haha you know i was going to complain about st lukes and how it's killing us softly and all (hey we can do that as a guest item! howcool) but HELL, st lukes ain't getting me down now. if my God is for me, then who can be against me?

xD

/i've been a little piece of s**t lately. a total girl. so i'm really really sorry everyone i'm trying to stick to my guy side and be nicer and all. i really can't handle it when my friends are depressed, i don't KNOW how to comfort them or anything and that sucks because my friends gave a whole lot to me so i'm really really really sorry it's Guy Jaime coming up. i think. i hope./

WELL anyway!

during those three hellish hours in which we desperately slogged away trying to work something out of tubes of chunky acrylic paint, i thought of something that just might benefit the world xD

how to make life easier for your drawing and painting test/exam!
1. in your artist research, ALWAYS reference impressionist painters.
2. for your background, always draw a sky. rub in a bit of white here and there to create the vague impression of clouds.
3. when in doubt, use grey.
4. when at wit's end, mix whatever colours you have on your palette, add water, splash.
5. always ALWAYS remember, sexyback not sexyfront. (the front means you gotta paint the face. this more or less always ends up with you in tears and your uniform in paint.)
6. specifically for MG art peeps, IGNORE mr ong at all costs. unless it's about extending your time. otherwise any scrooge or smidgen of attention you pay to him will cause your artistic brainwaves to be severely disturbed.
7. after you've given up on impressionism and torn half your hair out, it's time to switch to expressionism.

GOOD LUCK!

oh and just for the record, i could LOOK at lee joon ki forever but i'd much rather physically BE with eeteuk. i love both very very much. i do not love them such that i'd fly all the way to korea to take a bullet for them. frankly i'd much rather take my crush out to coffee bean ^^ (for those in the know. ;] )

HAPPY CNY EVERYONE!

for those whom i couldn't give oranges to cuz i ran out, come to my house after your st lukes visit (it's a stone's throw away!) for a orange orgy!

what was the last thing the PE teacher said before she died?
"return the javelins to me!"

-pick up lines-

Q: is your dad a terrorist?
A: no. why?
Q: cuz YOU DA BOMB.

Q: d'you like prunes?
A: no.
Q: how 'bout a DATE?

Q: is your name jenny? (example only)
A: yes.
Q: can i call you jenny?
A: yes.
Q: SEVEN O'CLOCK, yeah?

okay okay GO ENJOY WHATEVER HOLIDAYS YOU HAVE.
CYA! (:

the DARKENING DAWN

2008-02-01T20:03:00.001+08:00

TODAY ART GIRLS WENT TO NAFA.

for the uninformed, no the art girls aren't all overweight and have to take a pre-physical fitness test to train for pft.

it's the @#£$%^&* nanyang academy of fine arts! AHHHHHHHHHHHH *runs all over the place ole-ing and gan-bei-ing yakult*

ohmanohman EVERYONE there is hyperfunky in their own hyperfunkily different way! like ARGH - EVERYTHING there is made up of art la. art is in the foundation. the peeps there have their own whitewashed workspace and they fill it up with all sorts of artistic flotsam and jetsam and ohman the WHOLE PLACE just looks like one whole work of art. srsly the gallery featuring the REAL artworks couldn't be less interesting compared to WHERE they were made. you've got SKETCHES on the walls, polaroids lining the wall in a to-die-for pro fashion, emo slashes of paint EVERYWHERE and EVERYTHING! AHHHHHHHHHHH and then of course you have these people walking around in to-die-for hyperfunky jeans made up of black patches with gothic white text printed all over the place and random zips leading nowhere lining every other half square metre, and yes OF COURSE they made it themselves it's NAFA people, NAFA where i BET everyone makes an artwork of the remains of their meals and hammer up their own jewellery and SEW THEIR OWN CLOTHES and probably even the bricks of their apartments are individual works of art with every granule of concrete representing a profound philosophical concept or something.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

if we could die for to-die-for things, i'd have died a thousand times over already.

oh yeah it also didn't help with the dying factor that we were all walking around with PROFOUNDLY HEAVY SCHOOLBAGS loaded with all of mr yeo's a math and e math bibles and chem textbooks to study for a chem test we're having on monday =_= and the lifts were all so effing crowded we took the stairs 90% of the time. T_T felt like OBS all over again. and after that we gungho-edly WALKED over to plaza sing to reward ourselves for surviving the week with a round at the gastronomical heaven in the basement. oh yeah and guess what? NO benches in the basement. therefore STOOD AROUND AND ATE until we just collapsed in the corner of one restaurant and they very very kindly allowed us to hide there to consume our illegal goods. but tha was just for like half an hour and half an hour later we were back to standing, standing on the effing crowded train with no space to even put my bag down and all in all i think i carried that load of gold for about 4 hours nearly consecutively =_= my shoulders ain't ever gonna be the same again.

ah well~

oh i say- LEARN A CHEER!
it's a whimsical, feel-good thing you can always chant to yourself while drawing sensous mathematical curves under a bodhi tree.

[chant siiiine, cosine throughout the entire cheer like you're reciting trigonometry formulae in the bathtub]

[then rap out the following in a cheery bouncy happy chappy manner like the way you pop the champagne after you're sure you've failed your math test and you decide to live life to the fullest because heck you ain't gonna make a living equating numbers with alphabets.]

SINE SINE COSINE-SINE,
THREE POINT ONE FOUR ONE FIVE NINE
PLOT A GRAPH, DRAW A LINE
DO YOUR MATH AND YOU'LL BE FINE!!!!

:D:D:D:D:D

(courtesy of buddy.)

IT'S FRIDAY!
TGIF~~

cya! (:

the DARKENING DAWN

2008-01-29T21:03:00.001+08:00

this is dedicated to my dear art teacher stong whom i just found out reads my blog regularly. T_T

hi mr ong.

*thinks hard*

d'yd know how much time i spend on my art.

lemme start from last year.

okay art was still humane in the first half of the year cuz we were still using pencils then and we've already had at least 9 years of that doodling in our textbooks. so skip till the next half of the year.

the september holidays. our "moment" assignment. d'yd know, i spent my WHOLE holiday doing that piece of excret- that piece of A3 paper, slathering paint on it for three hours or MORE daily, cramming all my homework into the monday AFTER the hols. (might i mention that everyone else did it the other way round. other homework - real homework during the hols, art crammed into monday. call me a fridiot can.) oh yeah AND i covered half the plastic covering on the dining table with paint. kenna scolded for my enthusiastic artistic frenzies.

art exam. started panicking the moment i got the paper. couldn't do it for two whole weeks due to LTC. freaked out on sunday one week before that fateful friday. (and a certain acquaintance of mine was happily watching korean dramas. annoying can.) COMPLETELY GAVE UP HANDING IN HOMEWORK FOR THAT LAST WEEK. (got c5 and c5 respectively for a math and e math can. doodes whom i mentioned this to before as proof of my ineptitude in mathematics, THIS is the real reason. T_T) spent all my english periods doing prepwork. physics too, for that matter. spent math and chem lessons sleeping so i could stay up doing art. LTC mosquito-ing away at the back of my brain, but i ignore it. physco myself up for thursday night, plunge into 30 hours of wakefulness. no prizes for guessing WHAT ON EARTH was i doing. T_T

fast forward to december holidays. after one entire year of losing years off my life, one would think that warrants a good break. but? NAHHH~ art. okay so i plan a schedule. may i add that ART took up 90% of the days on my sched. ALSO that i gave up my enjoyable toilet-time easy reading to read my @#£$%^&* chinese books so i could finish ALL my chinese AND my chem homework on the SAME DAY. one day. once that was out of the way, i bury myself in paint EVERY SINGLE DAY. i spend an hour on the cheek. two on the nose. three on the effing dimple. T_T y'know mr ong i really kinda hated my face after that for a while. T_T i can't even BEGIN to emphasize exactly HOW LONG I SPENT DOING THAT @#£$%^&* EXTRA-BIG PAINTING T______________T AHHHHHHHHHHRGGHHHHH

and that's just YOUR art mr ong - excluding the 23045098y3405986120 design stuff i had t' do. i can put my hand over my heart right now and tell the world that YES MY LIFE IS ALL ART.

and the only reason my life is all art is cuz art IS my life.

T_T

yeah JEZ WANTED TO LET YOU KNOW.

^^

ever,
the DARKENING DAWN

2008-01-24T23:12:00.001+08:00

hahaha i had an awesome day today. but awesome days are too personal to put on blogs and wayyy too difficult to describe without physical, in situ animation of arms and flexible facial expressions. so... ^^ hahaha just that i really thank God for these days because they TOTALLY MAKE MY DAY. haha yeah la super lame la but srsly WOOHOO!

anyway today i realized that actually the shirt i designed for LTC might... actually... be... the... very... last... shirt... i. design. for. mg.

the dance shirt job this year is going to two of my juniors! =O i think in this aspect i really feel like a passing-on-the-baton-senior more than in any other school-related activity. ohman i am so demented.

and such a poignant moment! last shirt! somehow i found myself desperately thinking of other shirts i could design, like not have to design but want to design. desperately looking for places in which i can do a final job. thinking up stupid stuff like "maybe the sls could have a shirt, like the prefects!" and then i subconsciously berate myself for being such a despomaniac. jaime liew it's time to move on.

strange how it's things like these that really make the fact that i'm sec4 now hit me hard. turns me around and puts me straight in the face of reality, where a big chapter of my life is really coming to a close.

my 10th year in mg!

and here i am moaning unreasonably about shirts.

(btw, if any dance people are reading this - NOPE i am not taking the job back cuz the bug is passed, and it's time for the next generation to start doing these things ^^ - and it's a turning point in my life. it's uncool to turn back once you've reached a turning point.)

maybe st lukes wants a shirt!

=_=

dish it jaime liew you're being an absolute idiot.

time for beddie-bye xD

laters!

2008-01-21T16:53:00.000+08:00

don't know what's wrong with me man. usher's yeah remix has got me completely hooked. i listen to it at least three times a day, been doing that for the past one week or so, and i'm still lovin it~~~ AHHHHH EVERYONE GO LISTEN TO IT. (but not at night when you're supposed to be sleeping and you don't want your parents to wake up to find you youtubing away, cuz the bass is imba.)

today chem was @#£$%^&* as usual T_T fans were off, Bunsen burners merrily burned away, our solutions slowly disappeared, i'm sure our evaporating dish felt like melting cuz WE sure felt like melting... even the effing table melted la! okay fine so it didn't melt, but it freaking expanded. like wth! table no.18 now has a hump in the middle of the table where the Bunsen burner decided to spread some lurrve.

it's MONDAY again and...

i can't wait for it to be friday.

haha i know my blog posts nowadays are all really random and stuff but hey that's just a metaphor for my life now man. disconnected. detached... desensitized... DEPRAVED... deprived... of yakult.

kidding la. i'll get back into the haha-laugh-at-my-own-stupid-jokes or curse-the-education-system mood soon enough.

or maybe i won't, because i'm trying to achieve inner peace through a daily workout of climbing three storeys worth of stairs, gruelling top-speed mental exercise, manoeveuring life's politics and basically trying to survive - all carried out in school, of course. school is...

well i'll just let uncyclopedia.org do the talking for me.

"Most schools are in fact secret terrorist funding facilities that cut back on things like food quality and functioning toilets. These funds are then diverted via "letters for your parents" straight to Osama Bin Laden (who is not dead, just hiding in his mothers basement playing WOW). The awful (yet extremely well covered up) leader of this organisation is none other than President Ivan Shit-Sucker (PISS). PISS has been running this crime-ring for almost thirty years (he turns 40 on Saturday and we all wish him a happy birthday) He was (obviously) a teachers pet, thats right a pencil-pusher, a desk-sucker, an ass-kisser, and a piano player (naturaly). At only eleven years of age he met with ABL in the back alley of a McDonalds. Their plan was to shovel all the shitty parts of a cow that nobody likes and sneak it into the McDonalds burgers!! Until they found out that Macca's was already doing it so they threw something together with school (yeah, real bloody original, huh?) anyway I have my own plan... all us kids, yeah you too, get all this white crap and descreatly put it into KFC's chicken and then feed it to PISS and ABL! Mwa ha ha ha! Hang on... Ive just been told that KFC's already doing it... DONT LAUGH!! If you have a better idea then go ahead add it to this page but until then be on the lookout for anyone who looks like PISS... or CRAP (Captain antony Ass-Pisser) he's in on it too. Hang on, we have just recieved recent reports that ABL has been found hiding in his mom's basement. Well, why didnt we look there?"

oh yeah, after you guys have read this for starters, go check up what uncyclopedia.org has to say on singapore. sang needa, my foot... xD

aiight bye guys~ ^^

2008-01-12T20:18:00.000+08:00

this is dedicated to all the singaporean teenagers out there.

it's not easy to be them - us.
jiayou.

that was the looooooooongest week i've EVER had.

never been so glad that it was friday before. (of course, i'm writing this on a saturday because on friday, i got home, ate my dinner - coupla hours after i ate my lunch- and went for a nap. a very long nap. cuz no one bothered to wake me up. to cut straight to the point, i woke up at 12am after a solid 5 hours in bed, still in my uniform, unbathed >_<, disoriented. awesome right.)

i'm doing so many effing designs i think i'm actually... going... to... getsickofart.

*gasp*

okay la that's not possible. danggit. it means i've just signed my death warrant.

WOOHOO~~~

school is a living contradiction. a soft irony. the beginning of the end and the end of the beginning. the past and the future. a beautiful perverseness. the foundation and undoing of civilisation. bittersweet.

oh yeah, and bordering on insanity.

hahaha this is such an impasse imma sign off right here.

happy weekend! - or what's left of it.

the DARKENING DAWN

2008-01-10T19:34:00.000+08:00

OH MAN I AM SO PISSED.

today is one of those days you wish you could just take Life by its sorry little neck and wring it and shake it till its teeth fall out in the good old Enid Blyton way and box it in the ears like a good Brit.

I shall skip the miserable morning where I found out that I *gasp* had a Physics test today! Faaan-tastic. Oh yeah, I might as well mention that during the test itself, again I found out that my protractor was... miraculously... GONE. And of course, that vital bit of information concerning reflection and refraction formulae that I had carefully tucked into my memory last year was also... mysteriously... missing! Joy.

Then came along Ridiculous Recess. Like WHAT THE HECK?! I mean, we're all already tolerating Uncle Hock Seng's @#£$%^&* selling of his store, what with the bread rack gone (yeah the ENTIRE effing tray of bakery goodies including the sausage bun, the hot chix and the DO BALLS. meaning, NO sausage buns, NO hot chixs and NO DO BALLS! I could scream!), the sandwiches lamely stuffed with lettuce and tomato (the parts of a sandwich I'd ALWAYS get rid of because they invariably spoil the taste of the 'wich) which ALSO resulted in a !!!!SIXTY CENTS RAISE IN PRICE! - up from sixty cents! - and all the charsiew paus, yam paus gone, and the lor mai kai a dubious imposter. PREPOSTEROUS. The ritz cheese bites are gone too, EVERYTHING IS JUST EFFING GONE.

Yeah so ANYWAY, on top of all these canteen concerns (which includes a 20 cent raise in the price of the famous red bowl noodles up from one buck T_T), the Uncle Hock Seng Store (as I still deign to call it, just out of habit and definitely not out of a loving memory for the old man)... now... has... queues.

*stunned silence*

What happened to the "来来来！那个一毛！那个两块！来，不要推不要推！"? The traditional hawking of goods? The haven of the ONE AND ONLY STORE WHERE YOU COULD BUY FOOD WITH A RECORD 30-SECOND QUEUE? Like Oh. My. Asparagusses. I STOOD IN THE @#£$%^&* QUEUE FOR A WHOLE EFFING TEN MINUTES! What on EARTH is wrong with the WORLD?! I was there for so bleeding long, the aunty came over at like 3-min intervals just to strike a pose and say, "Wah, still haven't gotten your food yet?" And I'm like, inwardly rolling my eyes so much I'm sure the windows to my soul are all screwed up.

Oh yeah and of course 祸不单行，one grievance is sure to follow another. Just stupidly, naiively, CONFORMIST-ly standing in the queue and our dear Yanka and Joan Tay walk right up... *punch in the back* "Wah lau why you queue! Just push your way through la!" *proceed to do as advised*.

ARGH. I could've queued up at the red bowl noodle stall and gotten MORE food for LESS time.

SUCKS. So yeah after rushing through my hard-earned, meagre portions, I rushed up to see a teacher about the effing St. Luke's design, which a whole story by itself. Publicity comm. is like effing excretic duty. Just being in it is like walking around with a sign pasted on your forehead saying "treat me like your business". Only OBVIOUSLY the business I'm referring to is simply a euphemism for a much more crude word that I haven't the lack of conscience to put up. EVERY SINGLE NIGHT from this week's Monday to NOW, which is Thursday, save for Tuesday I've been staying up to 1 or 2am just - JUST doing the effing poster. So much for my effing resolutions to do all my homework at home, ON TIME.

ANYWAY as I was saying, I went up to see a teacher and because I do have great respect for teachers I shan't quote here. I'll just say that sometimes I think people think I'm a machine. In metaphorical terms, "Revert back to version one." "Actually I prefer version three." "Cancel that." "Fade that." "Add that." "How about this here?" "Okay, four versions then. Tomorrow, yeah?"

adsf;aisuf;ovaiuero

Oh yes that also DOES mean TONIGHT will be another poster night.
*breaks into song and dance*
HALLELUJAH. HALLELUJAH. HALLELUJAH! HALLELUJAH! HA-LLE-EH~~LU-JAH!

=_=

Hmm what else?- AH! Continuing from where I left off, because we were having that machine-esque meeting, I WAS LATE FOR LITERATURE. And that just so happens to be one REALLY picky-about-puntuality teacher. She just cast me this really disappointed look and said "You missed a lot. Like a lot." Well what can I do? I'd rather be in Lit class ANYTIME than be stuck there having my design babies sacrificed all at once.

Uh-huh. So yeah was stuck with TONNES of homework undone. Thank goodness for my friends. TOTALLY didn't know how to do Maths. So yeah, up to date, no overdue homework ^^

MAN. The ONLY productive thing I did today was go for Maths tuition. 'Least I got my tomorrow's Maths lesson work done.

And I have another design project for Dance Night to hand up next week.

¬_¬

*laughs maniacally*

I guess you could say I love my life. I love my life so much I detest it.

Somebody, I think the clock's running a little fast of late, isn't it?

DISH IT.

- the Darkening Dawn

2008-01-01T00:39:00.000+08:00

a new year!

*pseudo-celebration*

srsly. no difference.

just.

hahahaha just A REALLY BIG thank you! to EVERYONE i know and who helped me through this year - including my family, my awesome awesome friends, fellow sls, my wunnerful classmates, churchmates, teachers and EVERYONE ELSE xD

esp. my friends. all throughout the year, i've been looking back and REALLY, i have no. idea. what i would've done without you guys. thank God for all of you. it's you guys who fill up my - fuel tank? - all the time, with that special fuel i can't get anywhere else, not even from yakult or soon kuei or *snigger* peanut sesame ball. (but to the person who kept getting me peanut sesame balls, THANKS FOR ALL 'EM BALLS. ^^ they meant a lot to me.)

I LOVE ALL OF YOU. all that independence talk is crap. i could do NOTHING without you guys. my studies, my work my play even my DRAWING. everything is inspired by you guys.

special thanks to mommy cuz yeah at the end of the day you really are one hot mamma la. (otherwise how could there have been me? xD) and cuz we couldn't get along sometimes but HEY we're still family man.

hahaha daddy. what can i say. without you the whole house would collapse on our heads.

and obviously THANKS BUDD without you the world would implode.

and lastly - THANK YOU LORD! without YOU... hahaha i don't even want to think about it. without you, i wouldn't have gotten out of bed every single morning of these past 365 days. without you i'd probably have kicked my own bucket or something during the exams. without you i wouldn't even BE here talking about being here. without you i might've just died choking on the millions of fishballs i ate throughout the year. without you every single piece of sashimi i ate in japan might've... violently disagreed with my bodily systems. without you my com might've crashed during the art exam. without you i might've NOT finished at least one holiday art asm by this time! without you i might not even have all five of my senses right now. i could go on and on and on but i think i'd choke up the internet just talking about it and the bible says practise consideration ^^

without you, what am i?

ON TOWARDS THE NEW YEAR! chiong ah~

theDARKENINGDAWN! (:

2007-12-14T18:01:00.000+08:00

Watched Chicago the other day! =O

Got really pissed with the blonde. AND RICHARD GERE HOW COULD YOU DOWNGRADE YOURSELF TO THIS KINDA HALF-ASSED ROLE?!

The only part worth watching is...

Talk about violent tendencies! xD

Oh yeah they had it coming BABBEH.

Okay actually there IS one other bit that's pretty good. But I can't find it on youtube. The basic conclusion of the song is -

When you're good to mama, mama's good to you.

I wish.

- the Darkening Dawn

2007-12-07T12:30:00.001+08:00

lying in bed after my 800+++++ crunches (inspired by fellow CG teenager who told me "crunches are nothing la, can do 5000 at one go), reminiscing about happy times~ annen, i remembered that fateful day when we all got back our final final report book page.

our eyes skipped all the dismal rows of marks to see...

status: promoted to sec 4.

it's amazing la.
after one entire year of joking about retaining, somehow knowing that you're gonna move on just becomes a really emotional moment.

*pseudo-sniff*

okay imma eat my chicken MYOJO cup noods now XD

cya!
the DARKENING DAWN

2007-11-18T20:50:00.000+08:00

oh yeah i kinda forgot to blog about japan in light of the camp. weelll it kinda got a bit rotten at times due to person X (no reference to previous post) who showed me a side of her i kinda didn't want to see. but OH WELL look at these cosplayers babes.

NARUTO!

COMPLETELY hot girls that put manga guys to shame.

coupla black and white peeps (:

chobits and alice in wonderland!

some really pretty costumes (:

PRINCE OF TENNIS! they're an awesome cool bunch, you can really see they enjoy each other's company a LOT and stuff and they're really friendly to noobie foreigners like me too ^^

why on EARTH can't singapore organise her cosplay events PROPERLY?!
be yourself day man!
imma be a professional cosplayer when i grow up XD

aiight catch ya later ^^

Cheers,
the Darkening Dawn

2007-11-17T20:04:00.001+08:00

I LOVE YOU GUYS RED BULLS.
You people really made my days at camp the best there could possibly be.

Thanks to RENAULT for being the awesomest, awesomest group ever. You guys really pulled through and gelled together (albeit without me T_T) on those long bus rides and I'm just really, really proud of all of you ^^

Thanks to my DEVOTIONS COMM PEEPS who were always always there for me and who supported me all the time. Would've dieded without all of you man. I love you guys too!

Thanks to BOSS who made time just to come to camp and lasted 3 days 2 nights with us and watched over the sec2s like a wonderful tender loving mother ^^ And who rescued me from the sharing thing, and who was always there for everyone and I especially appreciate that (: I LOVE YOU BOSS.

Thanks to SARCH who was an awesome awesome mate to have throughout the whole gruelling process. For standing beside me and covering up for all my non-existent high notes, for looking out for everyone, for keeping that sense of humour alive in the midst of all these troubled waters ^^ Don't be so hard on yourself okay dear? We all love you and respect you all the same (:

Thanks to BAT, who appeared halfway through the camp and just really made my day not just with that awesome cute thing she brought for me, but just by her presence alone (: As she always does. I LOVE YOU BAT! Even though I only saw you for a really really short time, but it was enough to make me happy again and keep me going for the next 24 or so hours (:

Thanks to my FELLOW SFs, who just really were there for each other and cheered each other on at 3am in the morn =.= Camp would have been SO different with a different bunch of people. Yup so thanks so much all of you, and we all PULLED THROUGH TOGETHER!!! Thanks especially to my contemporaries the RENAULT SFs, Grace Lee and Jia Ni, for making life so much funner and lively XD we shall all cheer XX person on together! XD

Thanks to the TEACHERS, if any of them actually happen to chance by here. You people really examplify servant leadership, staying up the latest, being the most patient with all the glitches and everything that went wrong, being so understanding, holding the whole camp together with your care and concern and wisdom and good sense of fun. THANKS TEACHERS. You're the funkiest bunch of teachers I've ever seen.

THANKS EVERYONE! I LOVE YOU ALL!

Now go bed.

Cheers to everyone! Goodnight!
Jaime

2007-10-30T02:59:00.000+08:00

hmm.
(imma write in caps so it seems slightly more professional.)

Haha I know I've talked about this countless times before, near spent an entire school year composing poems about it last year when I wasn't trying to counter the problem itself, but the fact remains that the problem still exists and it's p*ss*ng my *ss *ff. (Woohoo if only it could! Then I wouldn't be desperately doing laps in the swimming pool every week in a futile effort to level down my two glutinous maximus-es. T_T) And if I already ain't being obvious enough, 'tis the workload of the Suffering Singapore School Student I'm talking about here. I'm writing now with the intent of some professional taking a professional break from his profession and unprofessionally browsing through blogs and coming across this (hopefully! :D) professional-looking complaint against the extremely professional professionals up there who profess to be professionals at education but in reality are naught but professional killers. ^^

How goes this? Well, it's all a really elaborate flim-flam. I mean, their means of torturing us is really so delicate and subtle that one really doesn't realise one is being tortured till one is quite, quite dead. It's something in the way of making one so busy in trying to keep one's head above the water that one doesn't realise one is already drowning anyway. T_T How devious. How very, very cunning.

I wonder how the Singapore government feels about everything? About how Singapore ranks 131st out of around 180 or so countries in terms of happiness? About how there's a constant leak of what little talent Singapore has and needs through mass immigration? -by the way, doesn't that already seem like a kind of exodus to you? Kinda like the Israelites right. Fleeing from a place where slavedrivers (the monarchy, you know what I'm talking about) whip at the Israelites (we the poor oppressed citizens of Singapore) across a sea (that could mean anywhere) to a place flowing with milk and honey (doesn't really narrow down the list of countries who fit the criteria either; just that Singapore's definitely not on the list, cuz we're renowned for not having anything in the way of natural resources).

I read about how teenagers these days are all supposed to be weak and frail and unable to do housework and unable to hold up to wind or rain and basically unable to do anything other than spend money, eat money, wipe their asses with money etc. And I get really, really really really peeved. I mean, yeah I got over this bout of peevishness a long time ago for the sake of not foolishly disagreeing with everything that the Chinese exam papers throw at us (newspapers have often reported that teenagers now are rather like strawberries [?!] - pretty, but weak - what are your views?), but that doesn't mean I do agree with what the papers say. Heck the papers man. Take a peek into the living hell we teenagers, whom, I deign to remind you at this point, hold the purse strings of your future CPF savings and are going to decide whether you get your upgraded lifts or not - and see what we really go through.

1) Pressure to do well, do VERY well indeed, for our O and A levels and even just PSLE. Probably because Singapore doesn't have enough land space to build more universities, it isn't enough to snag a couple of As for our As, to get into any university at all. So we tread the water like mad, our arms and legs whirring like clockwork through the turbulent water, just to take one gasp at the end of Os, after which we plunge back into the murky depths in JC and and resurface to fill our lungs with life-giving air again, and this cycle just continues until - we think! the end of our education. Oooooh, but haven't you heard? LIFELONG LEARNING is all the rage now! So that means our education continues past our prime, past our menopausal stage and carries us all the way past our golden ages and back down... into the grave. What ho! And there's one Singaporean life, just one more sacrifice for the good of our Great and Glorious Empire.

And do we hold up to the pressure? Oh boy, do we. Day after day we ask ourselves, what's the point of carrying on? Well, at this point, another wave sweeps us back down and we're reduced to struggling for survival again, or we pacify ourselves with the smaller joys of life - chocolate, ben and jerrys, or - for the more sophisticated ones ^^ - looking at pictures of Lee Joon Ki and, for others, a certain Jae Joong. And they tell us that we don't know how to be happy? I'm telling you, Singaporeans are the best at understanding what it is to be happy. Scrap a high-ranking job with a high salary and yearly bonus. Scrap the swanky new Mercedes you're going to drive to your disgustingly opulent office everyday. Scrap the 10-course dinner you plan to eat every night of your future prosperous life. I'll tell you what happiness is. Happpiness is getting a smile from a stranger. It's sharing a joke with your friends. It's rejoicing over the fact that the canteen stall has restocked its sausage buns (nothing dirty here). We don't (okay sometimes we do, but mostly we don't) get upset that we didn't get A1 for a subject. Rather we pop the champagne when we don't fail. Happiness is having one day, just one, in which we don't have homework to do. Happiness is looking forward to eating nasi padang during recess. Happiness can even be found in knowing that you've got about ten other people battling the z-monster the night before a major exam, fighting the same fight as you are, laughing over everyone's morbid plight together. Happiness is everywhere, and most of all it's on top of the education system.

And we've perfected this to an art-form. Because we know we're never going to get out of this vicious cycle of Lifelong Learning till we die. So we pull up our socks, tighten our belts, and sacrifice our sleep, our meals, our body to Contribute Towards Society.

2) Say that we don't know how to do housework? Oh puh-leez, newspapers. Every one of us who can stand up, see lightning, hear thunder, and run away screaming and flailing our arms can do housework. It's all a matter of determination. How much skill does it take to pick up a broom and move it in a rhythmic motion to get the dust all over our neighbours' doormat? Now the thing that really gets me here is that, although we teenagers are part superhuman and we can not eat and not sleep and not bathe and still call ourselves a civilised human while we slog away at our homework in the dead of the night, we're still part human and I wish somebody'd remember that. For heaven's sake, ask yourselves this question! Do you want us to A) contribute towards society or b) do housework? What the bloody hell is your problem man? You can't have everything in life. That's why so many of you are unhappy. Learn to be happy with just A or B! Didn't your teachers ever teach you that when you shade your OAS, you can only shade ONE lozenge? Otherwise, if you shade two, you'll get the WHOLE QUESTION WRONG. Now that's exactly where you're going. Choose one, kids, and leave the gobstoppers alone!

And from the fact that we just don't happen to think housework is a very high priority in our lives, you go on to conclude that we a) can't be independent b) are self-centred c) take things for granted etc, etc, etc... There's a whole long list of four-worded Chinese idioms just to describe how bad and decadent teenagers these days are. Personally I disagree with every single one of them. Singaporean teenagers do NOT grow up to be teenagers with characters or personalities like that. It's a human-eat-human world out there, and boy do we know that. As a Singaporean teenager, you fight the war on many fronts. You deal with misunderstanding parents. You deal with teachers who think their subject is the most important among all the subjects you take. You deal with CCA teachers who think that CCA is the most important thing among all your other school commitments. You deal with teachers who think that the school projects they're heading are more important than everything else! You deal with bubble tea shop keepers who have a bad command of the English language and mistake your vanilla order for a banana order. You deal with police officers coming to your school to conduct talks about how you should please not get into crimes during the holidays and make things difficult for them when obviously we don't have ANYTHING, anything at all in the way of holidays. Holidays are an illusion. (But we'll get back to that later.) And of course, you have to deal with other teenagers who are sharing the same breathing space as you and one day you're going to have to clamber all over or end up as a stepping stone to that other person's success. And obviously the people-relationship thing is just ONE part of it. Did I mention that everyday, everynight, everytwilight, we slog away at our workloads, hacking away at an unassailable granite surface? Did I mention that we, as teenagers, especially those 15 years and older, have conquered all these to come thus far? Do you really think that we, especially this generation, who are the transition between the modern and the traditional, could possibly have clawed our way to this point in our lives without having some kind of skill? Some kind of survival instinct? Some kind of independence? Some kind of perseverance? Determination? Everything you say that we don't have.

Bite your tongue!

3) On top of all this, which heaven knows is already more than enough, we also have to deal with people saying that we can't deal with all these, which happens to be the main target I'm aiming this barrage at. Mmmhmm, we'll dissolve at the slightest hint of a light summer's breeze. Totally man. I worry for this country's future if you all really think that, since the society makes the man, doesn't it? Just one nice thing you could do for us, perhaps, is to FINALLY get down to making those stickers in the public buses which tell us to please give up these seats to those who need them. As in, those who really need them. Just add in a picture of a student with a heavy, bulging bag, arms nerdily overflowing with books and files, and you'll do fine.

man tha felt really good. well it's 4 am and imma go bed now.
SLEEP TIGHT ALL YE TEENAGERS OF THE WORLD!
and those teenagers at heart. :D

ILYALL;
the Darkening Dawn.

2007-10-29T19:48:00.000+08:00

woohoo~ had a pretty awesome day at church yesterday! haha in the absence of the teacher, everyone totally opened up and we found out some pretty O_O facts about some of the really quiet peeps. like, the totally quietest girl in my class (nondescript, jeans and short - the works)... PLAYS IN THE GUY'S BASKETBALL TEAM IN HER SCHOOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHH -handpicked by her pe teacher k! the ONLY girl in the team! and on top of that she plays SOCCER and and NETBALL and BADMINTON. double wo-oh! haha and the two people in my class whom everyone knows are like the stereotypical loud sporty type, were like

can stop being so mysterious or not.
AHAHAHAHAHA hoozah go ruth! (:

O LEVEL CHINESE IN TWO. DAYS'. TIME.
then.
freedom!!!! -yea---ahh, no.
not really. ¬_¬ thanks again to stong's wonderfully dreamt up plan to destroy ALL the remaining vestiges of our holidays. T_T at this rate, the next time we're going to have our head above the waves is sometime after the O levels next year. T_T

calloo callay! oh frabjous day! -he chortled in his joy.

T_T

does God love humans better than angels, i wonder?

mm jiayou to everyone! for whatever endeavours they're doing now. (: enjoy yourselves ^^

Cheers,
the Darkening Dawn

2007-10-25T00:33:00.000+08:00

I can't stand being human.

Everything we do is tainted by our emotions, limited by our weakness, contaminated by our needs and desires that are our driving force in the first place.

The world is going to the dumps because it's overrun by humans. And even I, a human, can't be bothered to do anything about it.

Instead of focussing all my efforts on something worthwhile like stopping global warming (which obviously isn't going to be stopped in case the world hasn't noticed yet - that's when the end times will come), my stupid human nature is just really freaking pissed off at another human. Damn the way human's troubles spring from humans themselves, and create trouble for other living things as well. Sometimes I wonder why God considers humans more gain than pain. If I were Him, I'd have demolished everything, everything - not just a once-off outpouring of water on the earth - but really destroyed everything and started again.

That's the best evidence that there has to be, that there is some good in everyone. Otherwise why would an almighty God who could amuse Himself with thunder and lightning at the slightest flick of His little finger go through so much trouble and so much pain to redeem broken goods?

But of course no one cares about this, right? We're enjoying our hedonistic way of life, we're happy just killing off ourselves softly, gradually, eventually. We even decry the sad state of the world and we think that's cool. Oh yeah, where is the love? Where is the love, yo mama? All fine and dandy, but what are YOU gonna do about it? No, we wouldn't ever give up our twisted, oxymoronic, ironic bittersweet way of living. We go all philosophic and sigh and shake our heads and utter cliches like "Life is hard" "Life is unfair" "Life is meaningless" "Life, life, life." Then of course the more advanced ones pull their black hoods over their heads, scrawl skulls and chains and bloody roses all over their bodies and go and sulk in the corner. Thus came emo, the modern philosophy!

Or maybe all this is bullcrap and it's just the fact that I'm really, really, really pissed at a few people that's causing this whole outflow of seemingly logical, sad truths. Maybe I'm just being emo myself.

Oh dear. I really hate being human.

Shall I bring it further? Hmm, did I mention that I've got multiple personalities and it's screwing up quite a lot of my carefully planned real-life episodes. I just can't decide whether to be a swashbuckling sam seng, a mysterious maniac, an aloof intellectual, a total swaku, an obscene-minded smouldering individual (keep dreaming, Jaime Liew) or a demure matyr.

The obvious answer, I suppose, would be to do all at one go and coin the Jaime Liew Multi-Personality Phenomena. But then again, like all things Jaime Liew, it's impossibly hard to maintain at all times and will be ignored and left alone after a while.

How?

And all that ranting really hasn't done anything to dispel that chestful of dirty water. And I can't complain, because then I'll feel like a total sulky weakling who can't take on anything at all. But it's been going on for some time - the entire year, in fact, on and off - and well - see I'm making excuses for my pathetic self again. Alright you know what. I'm just going to take the only sure course in this whole screwed up medley of life.

Imma try to be the best Christian possible, and when the day of judgement comes then please Lord, let person X know how much pain and internal struggle she caused me at a time when I really didn't need it. As for person Y, her normal kindness and loveliness cancels everything out I guess. For person Z, I hope I'm not asking too much to just let her know that sometimes her sarcasm really cuts and her unprofessionalism really didn't make my day at all. And for myself, I really need to know how to improve such that I don't affect others the way X, Y and Z's less finer points affect me. And dear Lord, please tell me before my Japan trip so I won't offend anyone on that side of the border. Thanks a gazillion. Without You holding up the earth on Your shoulders, we'd probably be sitting in a pile of platonic rubble now.

I'm dreaming more about my Carribean island even more everyday. It's like I've got a picture of home (to quote Bat) in my head and I just really wanna go home and leave it all behind. And go home with my family, the ones I count as my beloved. Dear Lord, I just really, really, really want to go home.

So for tomorrow, I'm not going to be angry at... her. One resolution at a time. I'm going to let her know that I really love her when she isn't being a total asshole and Imma try and encourage her when she starts again about that workload. And I'm going to try not to shut her out when she goes on about it. And perhaps it'll really work as Jesus said and she'll do unto me what I'm trying to do unto her and maybe we'll actually have a happy ending.

It's worth hoping for.

When that happens I'm going to try and pretend I don't have a body and I only have a soul and everyone can see how blackened it is by my weaknesses and also see whatever pretty parts of it I may have too. Then people will judge me solely by my soul and my body will just be a shell to hold it.

Won't that be nice, too? Not having to worry about what to dress up the body in.

Alright 'mma go bed now.

You take care and have fun, everybody.
Don't think too much. (Nice example there, Jaime Liew T_T)

Ever,
the Darkening Dawn.

2007-10-19T00:49:00.000+08:00

sometimes i just feel like giving up all my plans for world domination and living in a small windy hut on a white sandy beach and look at a crystal clear sapphire sea everyday. with about three people with me, and serenity all around. no more school, no more worrying about politics and money and everything the body needs. oh, and a plot of land to grow the stuff that unfortunately, the body can't live without.

and then one day the four of us would sail off in a self-made yatch and keep on sailing and sailing and the sea would go on forever and then we'd see the sunset touch the horizon, which we never get to see in Singapore, and we'd sail to the end of the world and live there, and wait for the coming of the King.

isn't that what we're all working towards? true contentment. is that why we work so hard for the money? to buy the island? to get away from everybody else?

if only everyone could just give up money and status and power and everything that puts others down at the expense of others, and everyone would disperse to whatever parts of the world they wanted to live in and we'd be back to pre-historic times, only with intelligence enough to preserve the environment and get what we need at the same time. no more wasting time inventing wheels or learning to create fires.

now that's called living.

2007-10-14T22:03:00.000+08:00

It's. Over.
Thanks to everyone who 1) Put up with my constant "Imma fail, imma fail" 2) Helped me out with studiation sessions, and 3) Gave me constant encouragement and telling me it's okay to fail! (:

Hahaha this includes:
Buddy who always found time to help me out with my maths questions, and was even so nice as to pretend that it was all for relaxation.
Mommy who said it was okay to fail. I believe you.
Shuyi who gave us cereal and a note all the way from NJ! If you ever read this, I LOVE YOU ALWAYS.
Sandra who went through it all with me.
Boss who endured all my down moments, and made my day everyday you walked back with me.
Bat who was my Chem Counsellor and made time for me all the time. (: you'll grow up soon Bat. I have faith in you.
3T for being the mugger class! (: So that I didn't find it embarrassing to have copious notes of this and that all over the place. And for being there all the time, and for being so patient with an idiot ass. chairman.
Everyone else who secretly prayed for me and went "go Jaime" behind my back, for reasons unknown but THANKS ANYWAY.

What would I do without you man?
(Ans: Retain.) KIDDING XD

OKAY DOODS ENJOY YOURSELVES.
SEC2 SLS YOU GUYS HAD BETTER ENJOY YOUR CAMP.
Liana Chek I still hate myself for supporting you in insisting on a full games trial this coming Friday. *swears*
Gayle Sim I really miss you in MG. ):
DADDY COME HOME SOON. ):

- special post -

BUDDY. Your As are coming up! Haha yes I know you feel the pressure, but that's not what I meant! I meant your FOUR As ARE COMING YOUR WAY. YES ALL THE WAY BUDD! I BELIEVE IN YOU!

And I don't want you to become a teacher. ): But if you really want to, I'll be a phone call away if your students start chucking paper balls at you ):

So anyway!
Psalm 91:10-12 No evil shall befall you, no scourge come near your tent for He will give His angels charge of you to guard you in all your ways. On their hands they will bear you up lest you dash your foot against a stone.

Well if you aren't even allowed to stub your toe on a pebble, As can hardly do anything to you man! Especially since you're such an angel, I'm sure your kindred will be all the more motivated to protect you man (:

Okay STRIVE ON!
:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

TO EVERYONE ELSE:
A belated Selamat Hari Raya!

And really, I meant it when I said enjoy yourselves. It's an art. Needs practice. So go all out and practice this lifeskill now! NOW!

Otherwise Singapore will be the land of 4 million sad faces ):

HOORAY I'M GOING OUT TOMORROW. THANKS MOMMY ((((:

I LOVE YOU ALL!
I really do.

hahahahahaha ^^
Ever, the DARKENING DAWN.

2007-10-04T20:12:00.000+08:00

a brief note from the battlefield -

hey all. i'm not supposed to be blogging now but HEY! HISTORY'S OVER! =O Therefore in lieu of the "history hiatus" and the "english escape", i'm blogging. (:

okay this extremely short postscript is not going to give anyone the faintest idea of the magnitude of the art nightmare. so i'm not going to try. yet. (such great deeds in history must, after all, be chronicled at some point or another in time)

mm anyway all i'm going to say at this point is:

To everyone out there fighting for their lives, strive on. We have four more days of battle to go! WHEEE~~~
end-of-end-of-years loom close by! (:

/and thank you Lord for the constant saving of my soul. That my brain hasn't fizzed out yet, and it's still going strong ^^ and that my last-minute cramming for history was exactly the question that came out! That was totally awesome, THANK YOU LORD. oh yeah, and that we managed to find out about the new SBQ scheme despite somebody not teaching it to us. Thanks./

"And I press on towards the goal..."

See ya everyone! Thanks to everyone who shared in my history horrors and endured my mad raving and prayed about it. Thanks ya'll. And thanks to those who said they hoped I wouldn't die during history too (yeah I know you didn't say it aloud but what with all the cautious hugs, over-cheery "you can do it!"s, well y'know actions speak louder than words... heh.).

Ever,
the Darkening Dawn

2007-09-18T22:05:00.000+08:00

If I were to pontanc school completely and stay at home to eat sleep and make merry,

I bet I could put in 3h naps daily and still be 1001% more productive than if I were to go to school, since I'd be trying to do the same thing (revise like extretraszz) under the desk in school. So might as well bring everything home and set up shop for REAL and do some real solid studying right? Then you won't get interference from up the front of the class from a drone.

I think I shall start looking for a possible flu virus donator.

Life is like cheesecake, full of holes, spongy, dubious foundations, and melts into a puddle of fermenting dairy products.

2007-09-14T20:22:00.000+08:00

Goodness today was super dumb la.

Went down at 6.15./Bus wasn't there/Freaked out a bit/Started pacing to and fro
6.20/Increase speed of pacing/mutter incoherently/"Why isn't he here? Why isn't he here!"
6.25/"I think this time his diarrhoea's really bad or something"/"But I need to get to school!"
So at this point I called my buddy and buddy got daddy and daddy gave me bus uncle's number. So I called him.

"Uncle where are you now?"
"Eh. I'm on my way to school-"
"But you haven't picked me up yet!!!!!!!"
"Huh. But today you got no school what."
"Of COURSE I got school! Can please come and fetch me now?(!!!!)"
"But Hock Seng say today only P6 and Sec4 got school"
"NO! I HAVE SCHOOL TODAY! Can come and fetch me now?(!!!!!!)" *tears hair in frustration*
Short silence.
"Okay you wait for me."

And you know what, if I hadn't called him, about 3 or so other people would've been left stranded at different, unstrategic points about the island. T_T Man tha' was a close shave. If there's anything in the world I'm scared of, one of it's being late for school. It's a mortal fear of walking into school with all the prefects ready to whip out their little blue cards, everyone watching you, and you having to repeat your explanataion 1000+++ times to save your own stupid face.

Blehh.

Anyway...

Happy Birthday Lydia Yeo! (aka Aggie)
You're an awesome awesome friend.
I love you! <333

Hahahaha today we celebrated lyddie's b-d! All of her friends unfortunately being extremely financially challenged, we substituted a luxurious, deluxe creamy cake for a common local delight, lor mai kai. ^^ (Yeah we had to reserve it man. Lucky we realised in time. By the time we rushed there, there were only two left ^^) Spent about five minutes trying to light the candles. Firstly lighter didn't work. So after several "OUCH!"s and "you do it!"s, the lighter finally produced a substantial flame. Then the candles wouldn't light. Yeah la louya candles. Then when the candles finally got lit, the wind started blowing and 5/6 of the candles went out! So had to re-light everything again about 3 times. T_T

Today I set a new record.
During chem, I
1) Paid 100% attention 100% of the time.
2) Understood 100% of what Miss Sim said.
3) Did NOT fall asleep at ALL.
4) Didn't even THINK about falling asleep.

I think someone reprogrammed me in my sleep last night.
And I slept at 4.
Talk about miracles man.
From now on REDOX REACTIONS are gonna be my best subject. ^^

Aside from that, I would like to announce my new save cost policy.
The policy entails keeping your wallet bulging through giving up recess to (choose one) a) STUDYSTUDYSTUDY or b) play badminton.
This will last until the end of EOYs. The cash saved through this policy will be used to fund our midnightly EOEOYs (End Of End-Of-Years) parties. For those going for Japan sabbaticals, the money raised (or saved) can also be used to obtain a frilly new gothic lolita costume or something.

AHHH EOYS!!!!!
Dear Lord, this time I am really not kidding. I need Your help. Will be needing it asap, for as long as possible. Glory to your name. Amen.

Mmm strive on!

Ever,
the Darkening Dawn

2007-09-10T23:48:00.001+08:00

ahh.

i got myself landed in a horror movie today. at 9p.m. in vivocity.

cuz my dad was in the SAF once and so when he renews his safra membership or something, he gets these premiere (!!) movie tickets and so we sat down in the (very) plush, opulent vivocity cinema hall ONE (meaning it's a whole lot more plush and opulent than the rest of them) and settled back for what we thought was going to be a pleasant, enjoyable show.

how wrong we were - or how wrong I was.

first scene: blue-green-black pharmacy scene, a woman (nicole kidman) desperately rummaging through the shelves, shaking pill after pill into her hand, and downing them with a bottle of soda from the fridge.
second scene: spacecraft explodes in the atmosphere. pieces land all over the place. it's contaminated. (oo.) and of course, this high-up man touches one of the pieces and cuts himself. (double oo.)
third scene: man comes home, his dog is scared of him. at night, this other boy in another house has a nightmare, and we cut to the man in bed sleeping. his face is horribly, grotesquely deformed, covered with a thick, muddybubbly greyish-beigish greasy substance.
and so on.
people infected (and there are a lot of them, because the high-up-infected-man is forcing everyone to take "vaccines" for the new and deadly "flu") stand on the pavements, everyone and anyone, in black suits and ties and uniforms and carrying businessman briefcases and everything, and stare at you. you who are not contaminated.
they go after you.
you can't trust anyone.
and so on.

... damn i am not going to catch myself being the last one to go to bed anytime soon. because that entails switching off the lights on one end of the dining room and crossing that huge dark abyss between that place and the safety of my bedroom.

and after all the efforts i've been making to keep myself out of horror movies! this is like, the third one i've seen in my entire entire life? the first one was when i was really, really, really small. it was this vampire show that i hurriedly excused myself from five minutes into the show. the second one was "the Mummy". had nightmares for two weeks after that.

third one?
well. i haven't tried sleeping yet.
oh yeah, did i mention that when you get the virus, because the virus incorporates this human hormone in itself which is responsible for the natural human process of sleep, the transformation into the grosteque thing begins only when you fall asleep. (after that you wake up, peel everything off and voila, you're one of them) damn tha was the scariest part man. you see the people who are still people muttering to themselves, don't sleep, don't sleep, don't sleep... the first scene is replayed and now you know what kidman was trying to do; keep herself awake.

ahh.

okay whatever imma forget about it.

there are a few people i wanna thank.
1. daddy for bringing me to see the movie and buying me borders stuff. ^^
2. buddy for allowing me to disturb you all the time.
3. BATRISHIYA who is an awesome awesome awesome chem tutor! I LOVE YOU BAT are you sure you don't want payment?
4. everyone else who makes my day, everyday.

right. i'll elaborate another day. gtg knock off. haha see you everyone ^^
<33 the Darkening Dawn

2007-09-03T20:02:00.000+08:00

excretrrasss. (say ex-skrrrrrr[think a Harley Davidson revving up)ee-trrr(ditto)ahzzz.)

That's my new phony Spanishy-pro-sounding cussword for s**t, or, more generally, anything to do with d**n, h**l, and basically @#£$%^&*. Feel the satisfying vroom-vrrooom of your tongue rolling up in novel and equisite manners as you swear with a flourish!

(Of course I'm not really going to use it. As i've stressed, in a fast-paced society, there ain't no time for fancy verbal executions. It's just a back-up plan for when Ahmah [not her real name] goes all saintly and tells me off for saying all those poor discriminated-against English words. Basically, it's in the same league as damnation and faecesco.)

But really, this isn't a new topic, is it? We ostracize uncouth members of the society who say what they want to say in the simplest manner possible, in the most direct manner as possible. And yet we allow the "upstairs" to say exactly the same things, and we even nod sanctimoniously along with them. We may even raise a finger to make a delicate point of concurrence, raising a small intellectual discussion and everyone leaves the debate feeling satisfied and distinctly civilised. The only difference is that the "upstairs" speak in honeyed, perfectly coiffed tones (okay, this doesn't really apply in Singapore but all the same T_T) while "the others" rap out their opinions in grating voices. It's not even a matter of the ability of articulation. In fact, which is easier to understand: "I must express my complete and utter disconsolation and disturbance of heart at... am emotionally, spiritually, mentally, physically and grammatically affected by... in general... there i must reiterate that... I am most displeased." Compare this to "I think it sucks. Bad." Where have we time to spare for big words in an increasingly fast-paced society?

Education, civilisation, meritocracy? A regard for all opinions by anyone and everyone?

How disgusting.

/damn. i feel like a total idiot. everytime i spend more time with her it's like i'm wasting my time and worse, hers. like what the hell? since when did i develop such a repulsive inferiority complex? if i can't even respect myself, how do i expect others to return me the regard i have for them? and i was so stupid as to think i could be any better than what she already has. i. am. a. total. damn. idiot. and i'm like an addict. i can't stop doing what i'm doing, acting like a complete and useless fool. can't even bring joy to the person i want most to bring joy to.

this is such a waste of time.
i'm not going to spend any more on this. time, energy, money, even EMOTION, like what the hell? since when did i become so freaking emo?/

ANYWAY. shall not think about that anymore. sometimes i need to remind myself i'm only human. but then ARGH! why are humans such weak useless creatures?!?!?!?!?! - well i guess that does put the fun in life. -but one thing i know is i am NOT having fun right now. T_T

*switch*

We. Thrashed. Chinese High.
hahahahahahahaAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHha.ha.ha. really got to hand it to them. Claire Tan, Melissay Tay and Charleen Wong. Oh yeah and Lala and um, 2G girl? Patricia?

Thanks for the totally jubilant afternoon.

AHAAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Mmm I am going to contradict myself now. In a debate, language does matter. (But only in a debate, because you need to have enough vocabulary to talk for 6min and try to confuse your opponents. Well, what can I say? Debate is a high-class sport.) BUT SERIOUSLY! Listen to the CH boys and if you weren't from MG, you'd have squirmed in your seat for them. I shan't give examples here in case I'm brought to court for causing interschool disharmony or something.

But good job la, Chinese High guys. It was a good fight with three sexy hot females against whom you knew you could never win.

MG GETS THE NORTH WEST CHAMPIONSHIP FOR THE SIXTH YEAR RUNNING!

Oh yeah, and congrats to buddy for finally(!) achieving a non-holey dentist trip! (For those who know/can figure out what I'm talking about, CLAP!)

Alright dearies, or whoever reads my blog at all, the Darkening Dawn must take her leave!

-with a flourish,
the Darkening Dawn

The seconds are ticking by... The ominous Pile awaits.

2007-08-28T22:09:00.000+08:00

I ROCK AT STONING
at the back of the class, especially. T_T

But you can't help it when you're sitting at the back of the class, and all the information spews out from the teacher's mouth...
...condenses in the air...
...flies in one graceful arc to land -> . <- here. and you sit here, at X.
Through cross-referencing, triangulation and drawing up projected results etc etc... We have deduced, incidentally, that . also happens to be the exact same spot that the Genius Claire Tan (GC Tan) sits.

We wonder.

We also moan.
(Bemoaning our fate that our fengshui there at our kingdom at the back of the class is so bad, not even brainwaves can get through.)

And we laugh.
Laugh about the fact that we don't understand a word of the alien language (a mix of occasional numbers, copious alphabet, greek alphabet, with a smattering of fractions and decimals in a stewy medley of operational signs). ["do you get -" "*shakes head*" "... ahHAAHAHAHA aiya fail la fail la" *break out into peals of insane laughter*]
Laugh about the teacher's day gift we're going to give teacher X - that is, the Monolouger of the Year Award. I mean, she seriously deserves recognition for coming to class everyday and clock in at least 40min of pacing to and fro and all around the class, writing occasional things on the board occasionally, popping an occasional question and of course, talking to herself. No really, it takes real skill and effort, that.
Laugh about all the rhetorical questions everyone tries to ask us. "Do you get it?" "Understand? 懂吗？" and after all that, "Are you two alright?"

Life... is one big cheesecake, full of holes and rapidly decomposing into a pile of mushy dairy products.

Nehh. Update more another time. Maybe then major project code: Impossible would have gotten off to a kick-start. Then I maybe I'll stone at rocking or something. Make some sense. Do some studying. Be happy some. ^^

In a fast paced society, there is always a need for speed.

CYASOMETIMESOON! <333 the Darkening Dawn

2007-08-11T01:03:00.000+08:00

hmm. a lot of people have been mmm very - shall we say - uptight? lately. and very err. confused. HAHAHA forget it la YES SZE WING i'm talking about you. so anyway i shall dedicate this post to you ^^

1) TAKE A CHILL PILL.

2) if you don't like professional-looking, clinically whtie ones, pop TIHS one:

3) HAVE A KIT KAT, HAVE A BREAK!

4) kit kat in six pack. spoiled for choice!

5) otherwise just sleep with ice-cubes. like this smooth, sensational sample here.

HAHAHAHA RELACK LA.

iloveyou!

cheers, jaimela

2007-07-23T21:04:00.001+08:00

this is a random post.

i'm just giving everyone an example of how i talk when i'm healthily tired.
healthily tired meaning not the torturously painful lethargy one experiences when strapped into a chair during a singularly boring period by one's own inability to move.

for lack of something better to rant about other than the birds and the bees, i might as well do all my disclaimers here. so...

i sincerely apologise for the side-effects of shack-ness. so please excuse me if
1) you ask a question and i hear it, and, with the answer just on the verge of spilling out of my mouth, i suddenly blank out. in such circumstances kindly prod my hard in the classical ticklish spots and repeat the question.
2) i speak in disjointed sentences.
3) i give monosyllabic answers.
4) you tell a joke and i give a vague, moonlightish smile and go ehrm.yeahhahaHAHAhuh?
5) i refuse point-blank to move from my position, even if i'm sitting in the centre of a crowded orchard road street and people are starting to take pictures of me thinking i'm one of those dollie displays. (yeah like i'd pass for one anyway.)
6) i'm just plain incoherent. i'd be talking about the weather like it's the most interesting thing in the world and the next i'm crying because someone squished my hello panda or something. (quote abbygoh: byebye panda)
7)
8)
9)
10)
hey who left those numbers blank? let's fill it in for them!

7) o.O
8) +_=
9) i)_i)
10) @#£$%^&* ooh dear this person curses REAL unimaginatively.

do you know, being shack/lethargic/plain dead beat is akin to hypothermia.
both entail a slowing down of heart rate and subsequent slower breathing.
both entail serious lapses of memory.
both entail loss of mobility.
both entail (i think) sudden spasmic fits, as we are prone to fall victim to when our body feels like highlighting exactly how important it is for the 'cher to pleasepleaseplease walk out of the classroom like nownownow before

WE DIE.
because yes, both are fatal.

cautionary advice>>the Darkening Dawn

2007-06-20T22:30:00.000+08:00

OH MY TIAN. OHMYTIANOHMYTIAN OMT.

I'm dead.

2007-06-13T23:36:00.000+08:00

ODE TO P**** B*** DEAREST :D
(yeah dunno whether still can rhyme or not. oh well we can always try ^^)

Come my 15th birthday,
I look back on my short life
And I realise one thing clearest -
That you were always there for me
My dearest.

Bearing all my natural burdens
Relieving me of my bloody ransoms
Everything that soured my soul,
You flushed into oblivion.

Oh you, wonder of mankind
I emptied out my innermost darkness to you
Without complaint,
You took it all in
Again and again
And so
You've got me addicted, you fool
I keep coming back with more
No matter what blood or gore
I bring
You swallow it whole.
Into nonexistence, black as coal.

Thus
Come this day, my fifteenth birthday,
I wanna thank my mommy and my daddy,
My bestest ever buddy
My doggie cutest,
Not to mention the doughnut with the hole
But most of all,
I wanna thank
The Potty Bowl.

What would I do without you?

- heartfelt, from the Darkening Dawn

HAHA that's the last time I'm ever gonna write a poem about something so damn disgusting! T_T
But really. Mankind didn't advance so far to let man continue digging holes to put their "gold ingots" in. (yeah, now they've got these cool places called "banks". anything. whatever. ^^)

:D

UPDATE MORE LATER! (:

2007-06-12T22:07:00.001+08:00

AHAHA today we went to build a float! Again. And it was real stupid la. Only three people there! But we were still real productive ^^ Ofcourseofcourse. *smug look* (three art students la ^^) woohoo. And then we went to BTP and. Blah eejits Sandra Chua and Zoe Tey wasted so much time trying to buy candles and matches! GOSH. And after they finally found the @#£$%^&* candles, Sann had issues with 1) the huge bulk that matches were sold in (like 6 or 8 boxes?) and 2) when she didn't want to get the matches, she starting picking bones with the lighter T_T (sth like "I don't want a lighter, lighters're for smokers!") and Zoe was like in her real calm cool way as usual, going "how about later we just ask a smoker for a lighter and we light the candles." AND THEY WERE SERIOUS ABOUT IT. T_T GoodNESS. ^^ Then I got a wedge of cake! And we had it for lunch. ^^ And I had to blow out 6 candles right there in the small cafe outside Attitude dance studio, wahalu >_<

BUT I REALLY APPRECIATE IT GUYS. :D Thanks Sann. Thanks Zoe. ^^ *squish*

haha okay update about more later. OH YEAH I GOT A COOL NEW SUDOKU BOOK! It's like the NEWEST LATEST edition in Singapore ^^ pro right. :D heheh marcus and jh BRING IT ON man. >= )

okay mommy screaming. gtg.

:D
Ever,
the Darkening Dawn

2007-06-11T22:00:00.000+08:00

err. maniac laughter! woohoo~~

^^ today is sohpia liew's birthday! i think. at least that's what myaddressbook.com told me. at least i think it's myaddressbook.com. i'm making it up la. some weird networking website told me. but anyway. HAPPY BIRHDAY!!!!! loveyoucousini'mmissingyoudamnbadcomebackandplayblackjackanddaideeandbetpeanutswithme!

hahaha.

Anyway don't you think it's reallyreally weird. Like how the most glorified heroes of the war, all exquisitely uniformed and paraded around as in military heroes, they're the ones who've seen the most blood and gore and done the most perfectly horrible things ie. killing and burning and more killing and much much worse - and in some sense they're also the scum of the earth.

the world is full of irony ^^ no wonder magneto could escape from his plastic prison.

okay la being stupid. ):

ARGH WHERE DID MY ENGLISH GO

I am really most appalled, Jaime Liew.

Anyway THANK YOU BUDDY FOR MY WONDERFUL ENYA CD ^^ Enya is INDESCRIBABLE. Everyone should listen to her ^^

Next up on the list... SHAKIRA! ^^ then Bond. WOOHOO ON TOWARDS CONQUERING THE WORLD!

Speaking of conquering the world...

When I become the First Lady of the United States of America/or whatever superpower is in power when I grow up out of my puny vertically challenged self I will unify the world. Everyone will be under the Darkening Dawn dictatorship regime ^^ which will be unlike Hitler in that Hitler was a damn tyrant (though brilliant) but the Darkening Dawn is going to be such a brilliant, benevolent leader that no one is going to dream of voting against her, so democracy will be eradicated. Anyway, I will unify the world so there be no individual countries trying to compete against each other. Without competition, there will be no competitiveness. Without competitiveness, there will be no stress. Without stress, there will be no suffering. Without suffering, there will be no sadness/unhappiness/dissatisfaction. Without these troublesome things existent in the world, we can then move on to a wonderful golden age and spend all our time finding out which is the best position to fall asleep in and induce that dream of that special him or her that we've never had time to find out before because we were always on the computer researching the fastest way to have sex or some juvenile thing like that. See how competitiveness and speed is so hankered after in our society.

And we can finally go on to make that ultimate flavour of ice-cream, build that roller-coaster esque MRT railway only it won't be an MRT it will be a REAL roller-coaster to get people from point A to point B and that will be so much more practical because roller-coasters are so much faster, so much more fun and so much more adrenalin-inducing, people won't have to have pre-marital sex anymore because there will always be a legitimate, practical way of having fun. Not a stupid hedonistic society, but one that simply distracts people from having bad fun, like drinking or killing people by speeding. JUST SIT THE DAMN MRT! :D And there will be an express ride from like Tuas to Changyi, for speedy and fun transport! Pitstop and free drinks at MacRitchie Resevoir! :D

And all those scientists can go and tinker around in their labs and make the world a better place for everybody, instead of inventing nuclear weapons and stupid things like that. Oh yeah, and finally getting down to the drawing board on how the heck to stop global warming so we can have a beautiful world in which to enjoy the Darkening Dawn's regime ^^

So what're we waiting for?! Someone hurry up and buy me a plane ticket to USA so I can start working on my masterplan! ^^

Aight got LOTS of nitty-gritty things to do for school before I begin my campaign for the Greater Good. Blah. My conscience urges it but my body, mind and soul are all not willing to start on that huge pile of work =_=

Whatever. I'll get through it. Somehow. Someday.

Later.

Ever,
the Darkening Dawn

2007-06-08T11:24:00.000+08:00

Damn stupid la. I wake up damn early, go and meet people, discover that we weren't actually supposed to meet today, so I decide to go and hang around my alma mater West Mall and get some necessities (yeah, necessities 我的脚。) And guess what? Like 3/4 of the shops aren't open. Like wth la. I mean people actually get up super early so they can get stuff before they start they day (you can see all of them listlessly sitting around in the mall). The library isn't open, POPULAR isn't open T_T, and everywhere else that you need to get stuff from ISN'T OPEN!!! What rubbish is this! I mean like seriously. We consumers get up wayyy earlier than our stupid shopkeepers. SLACKERS. I bet the cinema wasn't open either la. But I couldn't be bothered to walk all the way to the fifth level to check.

T_T This is the second day in a row in which my dear shopkeepers were tucked nicely in bed while I stood cursing quietly outside their damn steel gates.

Anyway~~

OHNOIFORGOTIHAVEHOMEWORKTODO. sorrygottago.

2007-06-07T22:42:00.000+08:00

Okay I know it's going to be fatal for me later, when I realise just how much time I spent doing this.

But oh well. I was going to do it one day. And better in the holidays, when I do have some chance for procrastination, rather than right before the exams and I realise I need to do some cathartic release, right?

TOTALLY. :D

Sorry no real posts now. My brain is fried from staring at the computer screen for the past five hours. Shhh no telling my parents >_<

And btw I moved, in case you didn't notice. A nice change from muerte-na-iuvenesco, isn't it? darkening-dawn is so much easier to remember. And since it's synonymous with my name, too :)

ALRIGHT I am going to get down to some real work now... After my brain's cooled.

Chill, great grey mass. T_T

By my hand and heart,
the Darkening Dawn